


Beside you

by noellehenry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Actor Louis, Blow Jobs, Coming Out, Famous Harry, Famous Louis, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining, Popstar Harry, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-29
Updated: 2015-04-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 05:40:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 28,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3839146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noellehenry/pseuds/noellehenry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Harry is a famous popstar, tired of touring the world and in need of a break. He's also a massive fan of moviestar Louis Tomlinson. </p><p>Louis is a self-closeted famous moviestar who flees Hollywood after a scandal. </p><p>In the beautiful countryside of the Cotswolds they both try to regain control of their lives again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be updating every week. Hope you'll like the story. Also... English is not my first language and I don't have bètas, so mistakes are all mine.
> 
> Here's the [ tumblr post](https://noellehenryfics.tumblr.com/post/171103184306/beside-you-by-noellehenry-rating-mature-archive) for the fic

 

“I can’t do this! I’ll probably trip over my feet on stage or…. or… forget the lyrics.” His hands are cold, a sheen of sweat on his forehead, his stomach is aching, he's sure the contents of his stomach will soon be on the floor. Harry doesn’t think he can even make it to the stage.

“You can do this. You’ve done this before. It’s not different from performing at the X-Factor in front of an audience.” Liam tries to calm him down, his voice soft and his hand slowly drawing circles on Harry’s back in attempt to make him relax.

“There are so many celebs here, I don’t want to fail and embarrass myself!” Harry exclaims, turning his head to Liam, his eyes wide. Liam can see the fear in the boy’s eyes. He wants to hug him and tell him it is okay and that he doesn’t have to go on stage. He knows he has to push him, once on stage Harry will get a grip and he will smash it, Liam is sure of it. He’s done it on the X-Factor, made it to the finals and had become second. The public loves him: the boy with the wide green eyes, the dimples in his cheeks when he smiles, the unruly curls framing his face and his low voice, which always seems to speak in slow motion, ever so polite and nice. His stage fright had shown early in the live shows and Liam has encouraged him, comforted him so many times, he’s lost count. Once on stage Harry always relaxes and performs as if he is born to entertain an audience. Liam always wonders how on earth the insecure and nervous boy can turn into an entertainer within seconds once on stage.

“Harry, you know you can do this, the song is brilliant and the audience will love it. “ Liam says in a firm voice as he gives Harry a little push. Harry takes a few steps, a deep breath and … smiles.

“Hello everybody, my name is Harry Styles and I’d like to sing my very first single for you tonight. Hope you’ll like it.” Liam sighs as Harry winks at him. He knows Harry is fine now.

Harry walks from side to side, smiling and singing. He even winks a few times at random people in the audience. Liam smiles: Harry sure knows how to capture the attention of his audience. As Harry finishes the song, he is rewarded with applause and whistles. His smile broadens and he bows, then waves at the audience as he runs off stage. He jumps down and wraps his arms around Liam, happily.

“They liked it, they really did, didn’t they? “

“Yes they did, mate. I knew you could pull it off!” Liam hugs him.

“Harry mate, you smashed it!” A very familiar Irish voice calls from behind. Niall is running towards them and hugs them both. “Let’s go to the bar and drink to your success!” Niall claps Harry on the shoulder before he grabs his arm and tugs him and Liam along to the bar.

“I still can’t believe I did it! I actually sang before an audience that wasn’t the X-Factor. “Harry beams at Liam and Niall. They laugh.

“You sure did!” Niall agrees, smiling at him fondly. “Let’s order a beer before people are trying to take you away from us tonight.” Niall grins and orders their drinks.

“What do you mean? “ Harry throws Niall a questioning look.

“What Niall means is, people will want to talk to you and introduce you to others.” Liam explains while taking his drink from Niall.

“Oh.” Harry frowns, he had not thought of that.

“Don’t worry, mate. We’ll be with you.” Niall says as he drinks his beer. Harry smiles.

He has seen quite a few faces he’d only known from TV. Well, since this is an ITV party, it's not really a surprise. He’s spotted the X-Factor judges, faces that were familiar to him. Olivia Colman and David Tennant from the series Broadchurch, Jeremy Kyle and his favourite… Jonathan Ross. Also... many faces, he doesn’t know.

 “Okay, so let’s go meet the crowd! There’s a few we would like to introduce you to, one of them being one of our best friends.” Niall grins as he takes Harry by the arm and starts walking. Harry looks over his shoulder to Liam, who is just smiling at him as he follows them.

“Louis! Good to see you mate!” Niall lets go of Harry’s arm and wraps his arms around a young man’s neck and hugs him tightly.

“Aww Niall, always good to see you man! Missed me, did ya?” the man replies laughingly.

Niall grins as he lets go of the man and replies “Never!”

Another pair of arms are wrapped around the man’s neck.

“Liam! Missed you, man!” the man smiles as he wraps his arms around Liam’s waist.

“Thought you’d never come back to England, mate!” Liam says. All Harry can do is stare. He must be dreaming, he's sure. There is no way that he is standing in front of Louis Tomlinson, star of Grease, the remake, hero in the film Alive and star in most of Harry’s wet dreams. He is even more handsome off-screen. That smile, the crinkle by his eyes when he does, smile. His blue eyes, pools of water. And Harry certainly doesn’t miss the tight jeans that cover those fit thighs and gorgeous bum.

“Harry? Earth to Harry!” Niall smirks.

“A little star-struck, huh? “ Liam chuckles.

“Uhm... s-sorry, what did you say? “ Harry slowly turns his head to Niall, who is still smirking at him.

“Louis, meet Harry Styles. Harry here, is our new star.” Niall introduces Harry to Louis. Harry feels himself blushing at those words. It is only now that he notices Louis’ hand, waiting for a handshake. Hesitantly he shakes the man’s hand. A spark goes through his body as their hands touch. He withdraws his hand immediately. He sees Louis raising his eyebrows at him, all this time he hasn’t said a word to Harry.

“Nice to meet you, sir.” Harry mumbles a bit embarrassed.

“Nice to meet you too. I saw your performance earlier; you’re quite the charmer, aren’t you? “Harry’s blush gets even deeper. “I’m sure you’ll become Britain’s next no.1 popstar. You’ve got the voice… and the looks.”

“Uhm, thanks, sir. I hope I can live up to that expectation.”  Wow, he actually put together a phrase. Louis winks at him.  

Wait… did he just wink at Harry? Harry feels heat rushing through his veins. Liam and Niall chat some more with Louis before Louis gets whisked away by a beautiful brunette with long legs. Should have known, he thinks. No way, he’d be interested in guys. Harry sighs.

“So, glad you met our friend?” Liam whispers in Harry’s ear.

“Yeah, that was great. Who’d have thought I would ever meet Louis Tomlinson?” Harry smiles shyly.

Liam squeezes Harry’s shoulder. “Come, let’s get another drink.” he says.

Later, as Harry sits on the steps outside leading to the terrace, enjoying the peace and quiet of the dark, leaving the noise behind for a few minutes. His mind travels back to the day of the X-Factor finals. He’d become second in the competition. He still can’t believe he’d made it that far in the show. He only entered to see if he’d be any good. He’d enjoyed the few gigs he’d had with his band in his hometown and had just been curious. And now, here he is, at an ITV party, performing his first single, written by his mentor Liam and his writing partner Niall, who he’s become friends with. They have been getting along great from the start.

“Mind if I join you for a bit?” Harry hears a voice behind him.

 “No… no, not at all.” Harry feels his heart jump at the sound of that voice: Louis Tomlinson. Louis sits down next to him. “It’s nice outside.” Harry says while taking a sip from his beer. His eyes focussing on the lake in front of the hotel, not daring to look at Louis.

“Yeah, it is nice. Glad to escape for a while. “Louis says as he lights a cigarette. Harry glances at him. Louis offers one to Harry; he declines.

“No, thanks I don’t smoke.” he says. Louis smiles

“Good boy, keep it that way.” Harry sees him exhaling the smoke.

 “You don’t like parties like these? “ Harry asks him curiously.

“Nah, try to avoid them whenever I can.” Louis replies looking at the lake.

“Don’t think I like it very much either. “ Harry says softly, hoping he doesn’t sound too boring.

“Maybe, it’s because you don’t know many people yet. You might think differently after a while in the business.” Louis looks at him smilingly. Harry shrugs.

”Maybe, dunno. Did you ever enjoy these parties? “Louis exhales slowly and shakes his head.

“No, I prefer to go to the pub with my closest friends or chill at home watching a movie.”

“Think I’m more that type of person too.” Harry smiles at Louis. Louis chuckles.

“You’re quite something. Doesn’t sound like a proper popstar to me. What’s wrong with the sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll you musicians seem to enjoy? “Harry can’t help himself, he laughs out loud.

“I’ll do the rock ‘n’ roll, not so sure about drugs and definitely will have sex.” he laughs.

Louis grins. “No doubt that last one will happen, not with your looks, lad. “ Harry feels a blush coming up again as he feels Louis' eyes on him. “I bet the girls will put up a fight for you.” Harry sighs.

“I’d rather have boys fight for me.” He looks at Louis, who is now staring at him. Oh God, Harry thinks, don’t let him be homophobic.

Instead, Louis’ voice is soft when he says “I’m sure you’ll find a nice guy, Harry. You’re beautiful, you’re charming and sweet.” He brushes a thumb over Harry’s cheek before he stands up. “It was nice meeting you, Harry. Good luck with your music.” Then he turns around and goes inside, leaving a flustered and speechless Harry behind. 

****** 

5 years later…

The last concert in his world tour tonight. Although he is looking forward to this one, after all it is in one of the biggest stadiums and near what has been home for the past three years, he also is glad it's over. Harry is tired, very tired. Since his first single was released five years ago, he’s been working constantly. He can’t even remember his last vacation. It always had been a couple of days off before the next promo or rehearsal. He really needs some time off. He misses his family and his old friends. There is a knock on the door, Harry lifts his head from the bed

“Come in!”  James comes in. Harry sighs.

“Hi James, what brings you here at this hour of the day, it’s way too early to discuss work!” James grins.

“Sorry. I know you’re tired. I just need to discuss some details for tonight and then you can go back to sleep, alright?” James sits down on the bed and looks at him. He’s been Harry’s manager from the start of his career and they get along fine. Harry sits up on the bed and looks at his manager with tired eyes.

 “Ok, tell me what I need to know and then I’m going back to sleep for another few hours!”

“Right, so the label is throwing this party tonight after the show. They’ve invited quite a few British celebs to attend the party, so I need you to go out there and look happy. I know you hate these parties, just think of it as the last one for a while, ok?” Harry groans, he knows there is no way of getting out of this.

“Yeah, I know, of course I will.” he says and then on an impulse “James, do you think I could get a few weeks off? I really need some rest and I miss my family. I’d like to fly back to England, if possible.” James looks at him, his eyes narrowing, and scanning Harry’s face. He is pale, black lines under his eyes and he probably lost weight.

“I’ll check the itinerary. If I can I will reschedule. I’ll let you know later today.” James says standing up. Harry looks up at him, a small smile on his face. “Harry, I’ll do my best. I know you need to take time off.” Then he leaves the room. Harry lets his head fall back on the pillow and closes his eyes again, trying to get back to sleep.

Another few songs and then it is over. He feels exhausted, as if all the energy has been drowned out of his body. His voice is trembling. He takes a deep breath. He finishes with his first single and the crowd goes crazy. He thanks the audience for a great night and runs off stage in James’ arms and nearly collapses.

“You did it! It’s over now, time to relax, lad!” James hugs him and leads him to his dressing room, where Harry falls on the couch.

“God, I’m glad it’s over! Even my voice didn’t want to cooperate anymore. Please tell me I have a couple of weeks off ….” He almost begs.

“Harry, I rescheduled your interviews. You’re off for an entire month, starting tomorrow.” James says softly. Harry sits up and stares at James, not believing what he just heard.

“Really? An entire month?” his eyes light up as he gets up and hugs James tightly. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” he says happily. James smiles and pats Harry’s back.

“Go take a shower and come upstairs for the party… and really… have fun!” he winks at Harry before he leaves the room. Although still tired, he feels some life coming back to his body. He quickly takes a shower and puts on his black tight jeans and pale blue button-down leaving the top buttons open, revealing the tattoo on his chest. He stares at himself in the mirror, fixes his curls and turns to go upstairs.

James leads him through the crowd, introducing him to several people. Some of them he knows as he’s met them before. Other names he only knows because he heard of them. Then James introduces him to the cast of Alive and he feels his cheeks heating up.

“Hi” he says shyly as his eyes meets the most beautiful blue eyes in the world.

“Hi popstar, so we meet again.” Louis Tomlinson shakes Harry’s hand.

“Yeah, you remember we met? I mean, it’s been a long time ago and it was my first performance.” He says unbelievingly. Louis’ eyes light up and he laughs.

“I even remember you telling me you’d do the rock ‘n’ roll, you were not so sure about drugs and you definitely would have sex.” He winks at Harry and Harry is blushing like a teenager.

“Oh boy, I did say that, didn’t I…” he mumbles. Louis laughs and raises his eyebrows.

“Care to tell me if you did all that? “  Harry starts laughing too.

“Yeah, I’ve had my share of all three of them.”

Louis smirks “So a proper popstar after all.”  

“Still don’t like the parties though!” Harry points out.

“Neither do I” Louis replies.

“Couldn’t stay away from this one though, Niall said he’d kill me if I didn’t go.” He rolls his eyes.

Harry smirks “That’s Niall! I miss him. It’s been so long since I saw him and Liam, but…. I’m flying back to England, so I hope to catch up with them while I’m there!” He really looks forward to flying back home. “Have you been back lately?” he asks Louis curiously.

“No, I’m doing promo for Alive III and after that, well I’m not sure. Haven’t planned anything yet. I can take some time off, no new projects coming up so far.” Harry stares at him, he can tell Louis is longing to go back to England. He seems a bit off, though. When Louis looks up at him, Harry sees something in his eyes, a sadness that makes Harry want to take him in his arms. They just stare at each other for a while.

 “Uhm, maybe you should go to England too. We could do something together while we’re in England… I mean… with Niall and Liam too? “Harry doesn’t know where that courage came from. He blushes immediately. Louis’ face lights up, he smiles.

“I’d love that.” he says softly. A brunette girl comes up behind him and grabs Louis’ arm.

“Come on, you’re taking up too much of Harry’s time.” She smiles at Harry, but the smile doesn’t reach her eyes. Louis shoots him an apologetic look and leaves with the girl. Still the same girlfriend, Harry thinks. Damn! Suddenly, he doesn’t want to be at the party anymore. He starts looking for James and finds him talking to one of his PR people.

“Hey.” he says “I think I’m going to go, I’m exhausted. “

“Sure, go to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow morning at breakfast, sleep well.” James says. Harry says goodbye to both men and leaves.

*****

The 11 hour flight is tiresome. Harry slept, watched a movie and listened to music and is now bored. Another hour before he’d set foot on British soil again. He grabs the newspaper that has been lying on the table, skips a few pages and reaches the gossip section. He sighs, yeah of course he was spotted with some girl at a party. So his PR people are doing a great job so far. He looks at the picture; it had been taken last week. The girl had been some model, hired by his PR people. He can’t even remember her name. Then his eye catches another item.

_“Tomlinson and Calder split up?_ _”_

_Looks like one of our favourite couples won_ _’t last this year. A source confirmed the relationship is almost over. They hardly spend time together anymore since Eleanor_ _’s modelling career took off last year. Reportedly our favourite British actor is about to leave the Californian sun to go back to his beloved England. We_ _’ll keep you posted_ _…_

Harry wonders if there was any truth in there. Louis had seemed a bit off, but he was there with Eleanor. He sighs, why did the only guy he's ever been interested in, have to be straight. He has had flings, one night stands, but nothing serious. No guy came even close to this man. Why did he have to be attracted to someone who absolutely had no interest in him that way? He groans in frustration. He closes his eyes again trying to think of something else, without success though.

He manages to leave Heathrow Airport without too many paparazzi spotting him. He calls Niall from the cab.

“Harry, mate! Good to hear from you! How are you? “Niall answers his phone call.

“Not too bad, guess where I am?” he grins. “In London!”

“No way! Where are you staying?” Niall exclaims.

“Uhm nowhere? I was hoping I could stay with you for a few days?” Harry says hopeful.

“Of course! I’m at home so…. see you in a few!” Niall sounds excited. Harry chuckles as he puts his phone back in his pocket. He already feels better. It is good to be back. 

“Harry mate, what a surprise!” Niall hugs him tightly.

“I’ve missed you a lot, Niall” Harry smiles. “God, it’s good to be back here.”

“Come in, just leave your luggage here, let’s go to the patio and enjoy a beer together and then you can tell me all about your global adventures!” Niall leads him through the French doors to the patio. Harry sits down and sighs.

“You’ve got a nice place here.”

“Yeah, it’s great, I even have my own little studio in the basement, I’ll show you later. I’m really happy here.” Niall hands Harry a beer and lets out a satisfied sigh. “Liam’s got a great place too, also with a studio. So whenever we write together we do it in our own homes, saves us a trip to the studio downtown. ”

“Ah, investing in real estate.” Harry smiles. “I still haven’t got a place of my own. I’ve been travelling so much I never got to buying a place to call my home.” Harry takes a sip from his beer. “I’d love to have a place I can call my own, though. “ He’s really longing for some peace and quiet and a space to relax.

“You will, mate, you will.” Niall pats his shoulder. “So tell me …. How are you? “

“To be honest…. tired.” Harry lets his head fall back against the chair. “It’s been really hectic the past years, touring, new albums, promo, rehearsals, travelling, shows.”

“You look knackered, mate. How long before you have to go back.” Niall inquires.

“James miraculously rescheduled my appointments and I’m off for a month. Haven’t really planned anything. I’ve only known since yesterday. I definitely will visit my mum and spend some time with her.”

“Well, you can stay here as long as you like, if you want. Just texted Liam to come over for dinner tonight; just the three of us.” Harry’s face lights up.

“Oh that’s great, I’d love to hear what you two are working on. “

“We’ll tell you over dinner. You better get some rest, I’ll show you your room.” Harry follows Niall into the house upstairs. “Here you go!” Niall swings open a door to a spacious bedroom, neatly decorated in shades of grey and white.

“Thanks Niall, I’ll see you at dinner… you want me to help you prepare dinner?” Harry’s not sure about Niall’s cooking abilities, he was never good at it. Niall bursts out in laughter.

“Oh mate, your face. Don’t worry about dinner. I’ve got an Irish housekeeper, Mrs. O’Brien. She cooks and cleans.” Harry sighs in relief.

“Good, see you at dinner then.”

Harry wakes up at 6 p.m., disorientated. He takes in his surroundings and thinks. Right, he’s in London, at Niall’s. He quickly gets up and takes a shower, picks a pale blue jeans and a white button-down from his suitcase, puts his hair in a bun and walks downstairs.

He’s met with warm brown eyes in the living room and exclaims “Liam!” as he wraps his arms around the man’s shoulders. Liam hugs him tightly. “Harry, it’s so good to see you.”

As they sit down together at the table. Niall joins them bringing in what smells like the famous Irish stew.

He grins “It’s not the fanciest dish, but I know you like it and so does Liam, so I asked Mrs. O’Brien to make Irish stew for us. I take it you guys prefer a beer over wine? “

“Oh yeah!’’ Liam answers. “So Harry, what brings you to London? “ Liam asks after a while. Harry sighs.

“I needed time off, I’m exhausted, really. So when James managed to reschedule my appointments, I decided to come back here.”

“It’s great to see you. I’ve been a bit worried about you, you know. Ever since your first single hit the charts you’ve done nothing but working. It’s about time you took some time off.” Liam looks at Harry. Harry can tell Liam is really worried about him.

“I’ll be fine. I have a month off before I’m back in the studio.” Harry smiles reassuringly at his friends.

 “Tell me, what you’re guys are doing!” he asks. Liam and Niall are writing songs for a girl band called Red Roses and they are about to launch their first album.

“And how about dating, guys?” Niall grins.

“Still single, not dating anyone. I do have my share of hook ups, alright!” Liam blushes “Well, I’m sort of dating Sophia again.” Harry’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

“Really?” he asks.

“Yeah, we thought we might give it another try.” Liam says softly.

“I hope you really make it work this time. Sophia is a wonderful woman. You guys deserve to be happy together. “Harry says as he pats Liam’s hand that is resting on the table.

“ How about you, Styles? “Niall smirks. “According to the press you’re dating hundreds of girls!” Niall rolls his eyes and both Liam and Harry start laughing.

“Well, at least you guys know those stories aren’t true. And since I’m too busy with my career, I have been pretty unsuccessful in that area. Nothing besides a few casual hook ups. “Harry leans back in his chair and sighs.

“Still crushing on our movie star?” Liam asks pointedly.

“Well, I met him at my last show at the after party; he’s still hot. We chatted for a while before his girlfriend dragged him away. He’s funny, nice and…. so fit! I feel stupid for crushing on a straight guy for years, but I can’t seem to shake it off. “Harry pouts at Niall and Liam.” I have the feeling there’s something not right with him… he looked a bit off. On the other hand maybe I was imagining things. I was exhausted after all.”

“Talked to Louis about a month ago, think he’s a bit done with the entire Hollywood thing, he should take some time off too.” Liam says cautiously looking at Niall. Niall nods in agreement. Harry feels there’s something they’re not telling him, but doesn't want to pry. After all, it’s none of Harry’s business.

“So guys, I’ve written this new song, it’s kind of a rock song and to be honest I’d really like this to be the new single. Care to hear it and share your opinion?”  He questions.

“Yeah, sure! You wanna play it for us in the studio?” Niall asks.

“Yes please.” Together they walk down to the basement. It’s a nice little studio. On the wall Harry sees photos of Niall and Liam with several famous artists. He chuckles when he sees a picture of himself, a very young Harry with a bright smile, unfazed, with no care in the world. Niall watches him looking at the picture.

“Think we should replace that one. The innocent young boy from five years ago, doesn’t look anything like the present hot, sexy popstar.” he grins.

“Nah, just keep it there. If I ever become a snob, just remind me of that boy.” Harry says with a bit of melancholy in his voice. How young and innocent he was; ready to conquer the world, or so he thought. He sighs, no need to be nostalgic. The fame and opportunities he’s gotten is what he wanted after all. “Right, so this is what I have so far.” he picks up his guitar, fiddles a bit with it and then sits down and starts the first verse. Soon he forgets he has a small audience, when he’s finished the song he looks up. Liam and Niall are staring at him, Niall’s mouth slightly open. Harry’s feeling a little uncomfortable. “You don’t like it?” he asks when none of his friends comment.

“That was awesome, Harry!” Liam claps him on the shoulder. “It’s different from your former songs, rockier, mature and ….. More you.”

“You really should release this as a single. This is just great!” Niall exclaims. Harry smiles; this was all the courage he needed to stand up to his management team and record company. He knows they won’t be pleased, but this is what he really wants to do: rock songs instead of teen pop songs.

“Would you guys help me with the production?” he asks them quietly. Liam puts a hand on his shoulder.

“We’d love to, Harry.” he answers, Niall nods in agreement.

*******

 

The next day Harry decides to do some shopping, he’s only half way on Oxford Street as he encounters a group of fans and by the time he thinks he’s done with taking selfies and signing various items he looks up to see a huge crowd in front of him. He freezes, his vision becomes blurred, and his hands go numb as he tries to breath. He tries to steady himself, he’s not going to collapse in front of what seem like hundreds of girls. He hears voices in the distant and strong hands grabbing him by the arms, leading him away from the crowd to a police car that is waiting in one of the side streets. Once he’s sat down in the vehicle he relaxes a bit.

“Are you alright, lad?” The older policeman inquires as he hands him a bottle of water. Harry coughs and takes a deep breath and slowly nods a yes.

“Yeah, thanks so much for the rescue.” he manages after he’s taken a sip from the bottle.

“Don’t you have a security guard? I would think a world famous popstar requires one.’’  The younger policeman asks him.

“Yeah, well he’s not around all the time. Didn’t think it would be this bad in the UK, I’ve been touring for so long, I kind of forgot what it’s like being out on the street on my own. “He sighs. So much for his month off; he can’t even go anywhere on his own. The police officers take him back to Niall’s place and when he’s in his room he lets himself fall on the bed. He gets out his phone and sends a tweet “Girls! Girls! Girls!” and tosses the phone aside and groans in his pillow. He falls asleep soon, exhaustion taking over. It’s when he hears a knock on his door that he wakes up.

“Harry, are you in there mate?” he hears Niall calling. He clears his throat and answers quickly

“Yeah, come in.” Niall opens the door and jumps next to Harry on the bed.

“Girls, huh? “He smirks.

“Don’t!” Harry pokes Niall’s arm.

“So I’m guessing Elvis’ song sums up your shopping experience, right? “

“It was bad, Niall…. really really bad. Two cops had to rescue me and brought me back here.” Harry sighs. “This is not how I imagined my month off, I refuse to stay indoors all the time!” he pouts.

“I know man, it sucks. Think you need to get out of London. Can‘t you go to your mum’s house? “Niall puts forward.

“I definitely will visit her, but I’m not going to stay there for an entire month. Maybe rent a house in the country…. or something, I don’t know.” Harry lifts his arms in defeat. Niall sits up and looks at him.

“I’ve got an idea! Would be perfect for you!” Niall gets out his phone and scrolls through his contacts. He types a message and presses send.

“Are you going to tell me about your perfect idea?” Harry raises his brows at Niall.

“Well, a friend has a cottage in the Cotswolds in a village where no one gets excited about a celeb walking around, would be perfect for you. He’s hardly spent time there, so I figured he might rent it to you for a while. I just texted him.” Niall smiles.

“Sounds great, anyone I know?”

“Yeah, you’ve met him a few times. I’ll tell you if he agrees to the plan.” Niall teases him.

Later that evening after they’ve done the dishes and are sprawled on the couch watching TV, Niall gets a call.

“Hey stranger, still in sunny California, are you?” Niall winks at Harry, who tries not to be too curious. “You should get your famous ass across the ocean and visit us soon. We miss ya!” he says. Harry’s trying to figure out who Niall’s talking to, could be anyone. Niall has many friends, quite a few famous ones. “So what do you say about my splendid idea ?” he asks, still not giving away anything so Harry just sighs as he leans back on the couch. “Yeah, of course you can….. Talk to you soon, mate!” Niall grins and hands Harry his phone. Harry accepts in confusion.

“Hello? “He says carefully.

“Hi popstar, heard you need a place to hide.” he hears a familiar voice saying to him. He almost drops the phone, his cheeks heat up.

“Louis? “He replies softly.

“Yeah, didn’t Niall tell you? “ Louis asks, sounding a bit surprised.

“Nope, Niall is bad. He refused to tell me who his friend with the cottage was. “He kicks Niall’s leg, who just laughs at him.

“Ah well, it’s only me and you’re welcome to stay at the cottage.” Louis says softly.

“Thanks.” is all Harry can think of in reply.

“How are you doing? You seemed very tired when we met.” Louis sounds sincerely concerned.

“I am tired, I won’t deny it. London wasn’t a very good idea. I quite like the idea of a quaint hideaway in rural England. “Harry answers smilingly.

“Let Niall give you my number, text me and I’ll send you the details when you decide to go, alright?” Louis says.

“Yeah, okay.” Harry feels a little dumb, not being able to make conversation. It’s not like he’s never talked to Louis before.

“Alright then, I have to go now, running a few errands… just text me, yeah?”

“Yeah, I will.” Harry says and then “And Louis?”  

“Yeah?”  A soft voice replies.

“Thank you so much for your help.” he almost whispers.

“You’re welcome… popstar.” and then Louis ends the call. Harry is still looking at Niall’s phone, feeling all warm and…. happy. When he looks up he sees Niall grinning at him. He picks up a pillow and throws it in Niall’s face.

“You tosser, could have warned me!” he accuses him.

“Nah, the look on your face was worth it.”

Harry books a rental car online the next day, calls his mum that he’s coming over to visit for two days and he texts Louis to let him know what day he’s planning to go to the cottage. He almost immediately receives a text back with the details.

“You can pick up the key from Zayn’s place”

Harry frowns and thinks Zayn? As in Zayn Malik?  He types back “Malik?”

“The very same, he and Perry live next door.”

“Cool! I know Perrie from the X-Factor.” he types back enthusiastically.

“I know :-)”

“And I get to meet the great Zayn Malik!”  His holiday home is becoming more attractive by the minute.

“I take it you’re a fan, then.”

“He’s the best!” Harry’s smiling. Zayn Malik famous artist both in music and art and the owner of the best looks in the world. Harry sighs: another straight guy he really likes. “Face it Styles, you only fancy straight guys, you’re doomed!” he tells himself. It makes him feel a bit sad. It’s hard to meet someone who likes you for you and not for your fame. It’s even more difficult to find a guy when your management and publicist portray you as a womanizer.

“And here I was thinking you were a fan of me :-( “Harry almost chokes when he reads the message.

“My favourite actor, no. 1 definitely :-)” he types.

“Good, I don’t like competition!” Harry giggles, he really does.

“Enjoy your stay ... “Louis types and Harry thanks him… again.

He spends the night with Nick, going to their favourite London nightclub.

“So you’re leaving already?” Nick asks as he leans against the bar. Harry sits on a stool and nods.

 “Yeah, I need some time alone.”

“Sounds boring, Styles. Nothing exciting to do in the countryside, no gorgeous guys to take you out.” Nick wiggles his eyebrows. Harry chuckles.

“I heard my neighbour is Zayn Malik.” Nick almost chokes on his very expensive cocktail.

“What? Zayn Malik? Are you kidding me?”  Harry shakes his head.

“Looking forward to meeting him and Perrie, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen her. Would be great to spend some time with Perrie, looking back on our X-Factor days.” he says.

“Oh God, you already sound like an old man and you’re not even there yet! “ Nick exaggerates, as he always does.

“To be honest, my bones feel like I’m 80, so I guess I’ll be heading to Niall’s to get some sleep.” Harry says as he stretches his legs.

“I’m coming too, you know get up early and all for a certain Radio show.” Nick sighs.

It’s raining when he arrives at his mum’s house.

“Come in, son” she says after she’s hugged him in the door opening. They walk to the kitchen where he spots another familiar face.

“Gemma! You’re here!” he exclaims as he walks up to her and lifts her up.

“Put me down, you idiot! “She shouts.

“Never… I’ve missed ya!” Harry smiles as he swings his sister around in his arms. They both laugh. Their mother shakes her head as she pours coffee in the mugs. They sit down together at the kitchen table and catch up on each other’s lives.

“So you’re going to stay in the country?” His mum asks.

“Yeah, a friend of Niall and Liam has a cottage in the Cotswolds. “He confirms, avoiding the cottage owner’s name. Gemma would tease him recklessly if she found out. “I really need some time alone. “He says as he takes a sip from his coffee.

“You look tired. I hardly think a month off is enough, son.” His mum is concerned, he knows.

“It’s all I have time for, mum. That’s just the way it is.” he says.

“I don’t want you to burn-out, Harry. You’re only 21, you’ve got a whole life ahead of you.” She pats his hand on the table.

“I know, mum. I appreciate your concern, I really do. I’ll be fine… honestly.”  Gemma just looks at him. He knows she doesn’t believe him, he can tell by the look in her eyes, but she doesn’t say.

That night they play scrabble and of course his mum wins, she always does. He’s missed this; just being Harry, playing a board game with his family, wearing jogging pants and an old T-shirt, his hair in a ponytail. He enjoys it much more than those posh parties he has to attend wearing ridiculous expensive outfits by well-known fashion designers and preferably being papped on his way in or out with some girl hanging from his arm a model or an actress-to-be. When asked he never specifies the gender of his future partner. There have been loads of speculations in the gossip pages and online whenever he goes out with a male friend, like with Nick. He hasn’t checked yet, but he assumes there’s something online about their night out last night. When he goes to bed he decides to check the internet and yes... of course. Sugarscape has picture of them waiting for the cab outside the club.

“Nick Grimshaw dating Harry Styles?” No, but… whatever. Harry sighs as he turns off the light and closes his eyes.

The next day he spends visiting his grandparents and his dad. By the end of the day he’s tired and he watches telly at night lying on the couch with Gemma sitting in front of him.

“Are you happy? “ Gemma’s voice comes out of nowhere.

“W...what?’ he says taken aback.

“You heard me.” she says as she turns to face him.

“Sometimes I am, usually I’m not.” he knows it’s no use trying to hide his true feelings from his sister, she can see right through him.

“What would make you happy? “She asks. Harry sighs.

“A nice, sweet man, someone to have fun with, cry with, to love, to make memories with. A house of my own with a garden, a romantic dinner for two, I know it sounds cheesy, but that’s what would really make me happy. “He can’t help but feeling sad. He’s wealthy, he could buy a house, but it wouldn’t be home without someone to come home to and that’s something he can’t buy… happiness. She nods.

“Find that guy, little brother…. and be happy.” she gives him a kiss on the top of his head and leaves the room.

“I wish it were that simple.” he whispers to himself.

 

*****

 

“Wow” he’s in awe. The cottage is beautifully located in a quiet street. The wooden gate is the entrance to a small path made of cobblestones leading to the front door. A rambler rose frames the door and the garden is just gorgeous. Harry is in love. He needs to get the key from next door. He walks the cobblestone path to the cottage on the left, another beautiful house. Harry feels like he’s walking around in a Thomas Kinkade painting. Before he has a chance to knock on the front door, the door swings open and he’s hugged by a blonde girl.

“Harry! So good to see you.” Harry smiles at her as he returns the hug.

“Perrie, you look great. Good to see you too.”

“Come in!" Harry follows her inside. “Take a seat, I’ll make us some tea.” Harry sits down on a chair in the kitchen as he takes in his surroundings. The kitchen is light and modern.

“Nice kitchen” he says, when Perrie sits down on the opposite side.

“Yeah, we had it done last year after our tour finished.”

“Little Mix is going to tour the US next year, I heard?” Harry inquires. Perrie smiles

“Yeah, finally we get to go overseas, I’m really looking forward to it. So, tell me what you’re doing over here?  Zayn got a message from Louis telling us you were going to pick up the key to the cottage. He never lets it to others, so we were speculating…. “She looks at Harry expectantly.

“Well, I got mobbed in London and I really needed a break from touring and stuff, so Niall came up with this bright idea to send me to the country. So, nothing special really.” Harry answers.

“Hmm, okay.” Perrie says. “Do you know Louis?” she continues.

“I don’t really know him, I’ve met him twice, that’s all. He’s a friend of Liam and Niall, why?” Harry is a bit confused, surely it’s not such a big deal he’s staying at Louis’ cottage, he thinks.

“Nothing…. nothing, it’s just that Louis is pretty protective of his little cottage, not many people know he has a place here.” Harry shrugs, doesn’t really know what to say. “Well let’s go over there. I’ll show you around and then you can settle in. Have dinner with us tonight. Zayn will be back in a few hours; I’d like you to meet him.” Perrie says as she gets up and takes the key from a drawer.

“Yeah I’d love to meet him, thanks for the invitation.” Harry smiles at her.

“Still as polite as five years ago.” Perrie teases him with a smile.

When Perrie has left, Harry picks up his things from the car and locks it. The place is lovely. He loves the cottage style kitchen with the AGA cooker. The big wooden table in the middle of the kitchen. Next to the kitchen is the living room, small but cosy, dominated by the fireplace and a big sofa. Upstairs there are two bedrooms, he picks the one at the front of the house, and the other room is probably Louis’ room as he spotted a frameless picture of Louis with his siblings on a shelf. The bathroom is very modern, with a huge Jetstream bathtub and a separate shower with a rain shower head. He’s definitely going to make the most of both, he promises himself.

After he’s put his stuff away he decides to have a look at the garden. He walks downstairs, goes through the kitchen to the backdoor and is gobsmacked when he opens the door. The garden is a cottage style garden, full of roses, hollyhocks, lavender, delphinium, cornflowers, sweet peas climbing a white fence, geranium, daisies, foxgloves and hydrangea, small paths meandering through the palette of colours and fragrances. At the end of the garden there’s a small stream, softly flowing. “It’s a dream, this is gorgeous.” Harry almost whispers to himself. He takes out his phone and types “I’m in love!” and presses send.

“ _Okay_ _… who_ _’s the lucky guy? You know Zayn_ _’s taken, right?_ ” Louis sends back.

Harry giggles. “Your garden and the cottage; a dream!” he types.

“ _Ah, you like it then?_ _”_

“Love it! The garden is gorgeous right now. So many flowers in bloom.” Harry types.

“ _Haven_ _’t been there at this time of year yet, send a pic, please_ _…”_  Louis replies.

Harry takes a picture with his phone and sends it.

_“Wow, I have a fairy-tale garden!_ _”_

“You do. You should come and see it.” Harry smiles at Louis’ comment.

_“Maybe I will._ _”_  Louis sends.

“Going to get ready, got an invitation to dinner from Perrie.”

_“Tell them I said hi and I hope to see them soon. Have a good night._ _”_

“I will… and thanks again for letting me stay here xx” Harry’s feeling brave when he adds the xx.

_“You_ _’re welcome_ _… x_ _”_  Well he didn’t expect an x back, it makes his heart jump a little. Okay, shower and clean clothes and meet the great Zayn Malik, he tells himself.

Zayn turns out to be a very relaxed guy. Naturally the conversation is mostly about music. Their experiences, their favourite music, and people in the industry they all know.

“How do you combine music and painting? “Harry wants to know; he is impressed by Zayn’s creations. Some of his paintings are covering the walls in their house. Zayn smiles and shrugs

“I only paint when I feel like it. No pressure. I only do exhibits if I have created quite a few new paintings. “Harry sighs.

“It must be satisfying to create such beauty on canvas.”

“It helps to release stress, true and if other people like it …. Cool!” Zayn says, while he follows Harry’s gaze that is now fixed on a painting above the couch.

“I like that one very much. One day… when I have my own home, I’m going to buy myself a real Zayn Malik. “Harry states. Both Zayn and Perrie burst out in laughter.

“Yeah, well I was going to ask you about that.” Perrie looks at Harry, curiosity in her eyes. “You don’t have a place of your own in the UK?”  Harry shakes his head.

“No, never got round to buying something. I usually visit my mum or dad when I’m here, I spent most of my time in LA; I have an apartment there, furnished… mind you. So it’s not really…. home, you know? “ Perrie nods.

“So how come you stay at Louis’ place? “Zayn asks.

“Oh, Perrie didn't tell you? Needed a place away from the crowds. I was mobbed in London when I went shopping. That’s when I realized, I really wanted some peace and quiet. “Harry plays with the wineglass in his hands. “Niall came up with the plan.”  

“You know Louis?” Zayn asks, while he’s lighting a cigarette.

“No, not really. I only met him twice in person and we’re texting since I got here, he seems like a nice guy.” Harry replies.

“He is one of my best friends. We were just wondering, cause he never lets anyone know about the cottage, likes to keep it to himself. So we were surprised when he texted that you would collect the key. He must like you if he lets you stay here.” Zayn says while watching Harry.

“Perhaps, or he’s just doing Niall a favour?” Harry offers.

“Nah, don’t think so. So what are your plans now that you have time off? “Zayn blows some smoke in the air.

“Write some new songs, sleep….. a lot, relax…” Harry leans back in his chair. Zayn grins.

“Sounds like a good plan.”

Harry leaves at midnight. He checks his phone, just a message from James letting him know when he’s due to leave the UK again and one from Niall. “Found it? “  He quickly replies “Yes … dream house, thanks for your help. “and turns it off.

He’s woken by the sound of birds singing, he opens one eye to check time. Lunchtime?! He jumps out of bed, putting on an old jeans and T-shirt and walks downstairs. His mum had picked up a few groceries for him before he’d left Holmes Chapel, so he could fix something for breakfast, or lunch. He needs to do some shopping. Perrie told him there were several farmer’s markets around and a Tesco in Stow-on-the-Wold. He makes some eggs and opens his laptop, checking news and … some gossip. He chuckles when he reads he’s fled London to visit his family. Well for once they got some of it right. There’s an article about Britain’s new sensational girl band Red Roses. Harry decides to read, although he knows half of it is just rubbish.

After he’s finished lunch, he opens the kitchen door and wanders through the garden. All the colours and scents are an invitation to bees, butterflies, dragonflies and wildlife. Plants overflowing their beds, climbing roses scrambling up the porch’s posts, blown lilacs and magnolia showing off their leaves forming a hedge. Harry inhales the scents of the honeysuckle climbing the fence. “Oh Louis, you don’t know what you’re missing. “ He sighs. He takes another picture of the garden with his phone, the honeysuckle in the centre and sends it. “Smells heavenly” he adds.

Grocery shopping isn’t too bad. Only two girls asking him if they can take his picture. After he’s put the groceries away in the cupboards and the storage room he grabs his guitar and sits on the couch on the porch and tries a few chords. He’s strumming softly as he takes in the beauty of the garden. He should write a song about it, something sweet, soft and flowing.

The next day he spends lazy outside on the porch, guitar and teapot within reach as he enjoys the warm summer day with the pleasant sounds coming from the bees and the birds in the garden and a soft breeze rustling the leaves. His phone starts buzzing, he ignores the sound and keeps his eyes shut behind the sunglasses. It’s only a few minutes later when he hears footsteps on the gravel of the garden path. He raises his sunglasses to see who’s disturbing his peace and quiet.

“Harry, I’ve been trying to reach you, why didn’t you pick up your phone?” Perrie accuses him, looking a bit agitated.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to, just too lazy to pick it up. Why? What’s up? “He asks a bit worried.

“Zayn got a text from Louis, saying “All hell broke loose”.” Perrie continues a bit out of breath as she takes a seat on a chair next to Harry.

“I don’t understand. What did he mean by that? “Harry is confused.

“Have you checked the internet today? It’s all over the headlines. “Perrie sighs in disbelief.

“Sorry, no. Told you I’m lazy. It’s obviously something big, since you’re so uptight, so… spill. What did I miss?” Harry sits up straight and pours himself and Perrie a cup of tea.

“The computer of a high profile Hollywood male escort got hacked.” Perrie says softly, Harry is still confused.

“Okay….” he tries carefully. “And?”  

“There’s a list of celeb clients published online. “Perrie looks at him worriedly, then says “You have no idea, don’t you? “ Harry shakes his head.

“I can’t be on the list, because I’ve never hired an escort…. so…. I’m a little confused here.” he admits. Perrie takes out her phone and searches online and then hands him her phone.

“Oh…. quite a few names I know.” he says, before he exclaims “shit…….. Louis?” he looks at Perrie in disbelief. “He can’t be!” Harry’s staring at the screen and then up to Perrie. “I don’t understand… he’s got a girlfriend. For years I may add …” Perrie shakes her head.

“Eleanor is just … a distraction, to keep up the “straight” image. He hires her, Harry. “She says, voice soft.

“ Fuck… I had no idea.” he whispers. “You said he texted Zayn?” Perrie nods. “What is he going to do?” Harry asks softly.

“I don’t know, only talked to Zayn for a minute, he’s in the studio. He’ll be back in an hour, guess we’ll know more.” she says.

“Bring him over for dinner, I’m going to make us a chicken salad for dinner. “ Perrie smiles and says “I will. Have to go back now, packing bags for the short summer tour. “

Harry leans back on the couch when Perrie has left. He can’t quite get it into his head. All these years he’d been thinking he was having a crush on a straight guy.

Two hours later they´re sitting outside on the porch, Harry just served the chicken salad and poured some white wine. Perrie looks at Zayn expectantly.

`Did you talk to Louis?” she asks him. Zayn nods

“Yeah, I did. He called this afternoon, sounding tired, defeated.”

“Poor Louis” Perrie says softly. Harry is picking absentmindedly at his salad.

“What is he going to do, stay in LA?” he looks at Zayn.

“Don’t know, think he said something about leaving the US for a bit, until things calmed down.” Both Perrie and Harry nod understandingly.

“He should come here.” Harry suddenly blurts out. Zayn and Perrie look at him in surprise.

“Here, as in his cottage, you mean? “ Perrie says.

“Yeah, it’s his, after all. Besides, he could get some peace and quiet here. I can always hire a place somewhere else.” Harry explains.

From the way he looks at the couple they know he’s serious about the idea.

“Okay…. are you sure Harry? You could always stay at our place if necessary, both Perrie and I are starting a tour, so we’re gone.” Harry nods.

“Very sure, yes! Let’s tell him.” he says confidently.

“You tell him, it’s your idea.” Zayn smiles at him.

“Oh… right. I can do that.” he says a bit sheepishly.

“Go on… call him, you idiot!” Perrie nudges him with her elbow.

“Now?” Harry panics. It’s one thing to come up with an idea, but he’s never called Louis before, so he feels a slight panic coming over him.

“Yes … now!” Perrie rolls her eyes. Harry takes out his phone from his back pocket and scrolls through his contacts. He hesitates before he presses call. Almost immediately he hears a voice answering

“Hi popstar, how’s life treating you? “

“Better than life’s treating you at the moment, I suppose.” Harry answers with a blush on his cheeks.

“Yeah, mine is a bit shit right now.” he hears Louis sighing.

“How are you feeling?” Harry asks attentively.

“Tired, defeated and in a way relieved to be honest. “Louis says softly. “It was just a shit coming out, been getting calls all day…. good and bad ones. Paparazzi outside my apartment building since last night.” Harry can hear Louis taking a deep breath.

“Louis….” he says hesitantly.

“Yeah?” he hears Louis asking.

“Zayn, Perrie and I have been talking and I sort of thought maybe you’d like to come here and stay at your cottage, you know ….. to have some peace and quiet. I can move in theirs if you want, since they’re both starting a tour.” he rushes. It stays quiet on the other end of the phone for a few seconds and then he hears

“I’d love to, that is a great idea…. yeah...are you sure though?” Louis asks him.

“Yeah, definitely. Hey… it’s your place, remember? “Harry reassures him.

“Harry…. there’s no need for you to move out, unless of course…. you want to be alone, I understand. It’s just I’d like to have someone around, to keep me from moping too much.” There’s a bit of teasing in Louis’ voice that makes Harry giggle. “Wait, are you giggling, popstar? Seriously?”

‘Sorry. “Harry apologizes, still smiling. “And I’d love to stay. If you mope too much I can always move next door.” He winks at Zayn and Perrie, who’s laughing out loud.

“Okay, that’s settled then. I’ll let you know when I’ll be arriving, so you have time to get rid of any secret lover that might be staying with you. Don’t want to interrupt your love life.” Harry starts laughing.

“Right, how kind of you. Bye, talk to you soon.” he finishes the call. That phone call wasn’t half as bad as he’d expected. Zayn is smirking and Perrie is still wiping the tears from laughing from her eyes.

“Glad you called, man.” Zayn says. “It’s good to hear Tommo hasn’t lost his sense of humour. Think you two will get along fine, Harry.”

Lying in bed that night it hits him. Soon his idol, the man of his dreams will be sharing the house with him. “Holy shit.” he says quietly to himself. What if he doesn’t like me? Or… what if I don’t like him? Not that he really thinks he won’t like him: after all he’s friends with Niall, Liam, Zayn and Perrie, surely that means something. But, yeah he’s only met Louis twice, briefly and texted a couple of times; that doesn’t count, does it? He sighs, curses himself for his spontaneous invitation.

Louis texts him, alright. It’s just ...Harry is browsing through several antique shops in Stow-on-the-Wold and buys a Victorian zinc water jug with a ribbed band he can picture on top of  the mahogany chest of drawers in the hallway, filled with fresh cut flowers from the garden. That was before he spotted a white rectangle Victorian photo frame on a shelf. He immediately has to think of the picture in Louis’ room that is still frameless. He debates, the picture needs a frame, preferably a frame that shows it had been loved by his former owners as Louis obviously loves his siblings very much, he really wants it to be special. He can always pass if off as a “thank-you-for- letting-me-stay- here-gift”, can’t he? He buys the frame as well. So Harry lost a bit track of time and by the time he reaches his car, his phone rings.

“Yeah?” he answers without looking at the caller ID.

“Popstar! Where the heck are you? I’ve been trying to reach you for almost an hour!” Louis’ voice rings in Harry’s ear.

“Oh shit… fuck! What time is it?” Harry feels a rush of panic through his body.

“It’s 4 pm and I really would like to get into the house, jetlag is hitting me.” Harry can hear Louis is tired.

“I’m so sorry, guess I lost track of time, I’ll be there in 20 minutes, promise.” he apologizes.

“Alright, don’t worry. I’m at Zayn’s, I’ll see you there, ok?” Louis answers him.

When he arrives, Zayn wiggles his eyebrows at him.

“Forgot about Louis?” he smirks. Harry blushes immediately. Behind Zayn he can see Louis looking amused.

“Sorry… I really am. I was shopping for groceries and visited a few other shops in Stow; just forgot about time.” he says shyly. He feels pretty embarrassing. Louis smiles at him

“I like hearing the word groceries. Does that mean you’re cooking dinner tonight?” his voice sounds hopeful.

“Well, yeah… that was the intention. I was going to invite Zayn too, if that’s alright?” he’s a bit unsure. Louis looks really tired.

“Sounds like a great plan!” he reassures Harry. “If you could just give me the key to the house; I’m going to take a nap before dinner. “ Louis yawns. Harry hands him the key and Louis walks off. Zayn offers him a drink and they sit outside on the terrace.

“Sorry about all of this, that was really stupid of me. “ Harry apologizes again.

“Nah, it’s fine, man. Gave Louis and me some time to talk. We were just worried something happened to you, you never know with fans, that’s all.” Harry smiles at him.

“How is he?” he asks Zayn.

“Tired, a bit defeated, if you ask me. Think he’s going to need quite some time to figure out where to go from here. Hollywood’s not where he needs to be right now.” Zayn says, his voice sounding serious. “I hate that I have to leave tomorrow. I wish I could stay, he can use a friend right now. Keep an eye on him, Harry, he’s likely to pretend all is fine, but deep down he’s not fine at all.”

“I will do everything I can, if he’ll let me. We hardly know each other, not sure if I’m the right person to support him.” Harry looks right at Zayn.

“He likes you, you’ll do just fine, trust me.” Harry isn’t so sure, so he just nods.

He’s almost finished cooking the pasta sauce when he hears footsteps coming downstairs. Louis is dressed in grey sweatpants and a plain white T-shirt that looks way too big on him. His hair is still wet from showering. His eyes light up when he sees Harry behind the stove.

“Now that is a nice picture to come home to, my AGA being properly used.” he says as he enters the kitchen.

“Hi “Harry says while he looks over his shoulder to see Louis grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. “Did you sleep well?” he asks.

“The best…. since last week anyway. So what you’re cooking?” he sits down at the kitchen table and place his feet on another chair.

“Just something simple: spaghetti.” Harry replies. “Smells good, I don’t cook very often. I’m not very good at it, that’s why it’s nice to see someone using the stove properly.” Louis explains.

“It’s a great cooker, I love it. I like cooking, I hardly get to do it, though, with being on the road and all. “Harry says as he puts the plates on the table.

“Ah well, you can cook what- and whenever you like while you’re here. “Louis smiles slyly at Harry. Harry grins

“Right, so you don’t have to cook, you mean.” Louis laughs.

“Damn, you caught me.”  

The kitchen door opens and Zayn walks in, also dressed in sweatpants and a black T-shirt.

“Ah, smells good, Styles. “He compliments Harry. Harry beams.

“Ready to go on tour?” Louis asks Zayn as they’re all sitting at the table starting dinner.

“Yeah, it’s just three months this time, touring mainland Europe and the UK. No jetlag, short flights, it’ll be okay.” Harry sighs.

“Man, am I glad my tour is over. I’m done with it for a long time, if I have a say in it.” he says.

“I know, those World Tours are really bad.” Zayn agrees.

“Wouldn’t mind playing in smaller venues in just the UK for a change. “ Harry says, cupping his head in his hands, his elbows leaning on the table.

“From what I’ve seen, you have way too many fans, popstar. They would be very disappointed not be able to get tickets to see you.” Louis says. “Me on the other hand, I think I’ve lost quite a few fans this past week. So, be careful what you wish for. “

“How bad is it?” Zayn asks him. Louis shoves his empty plate aside.

“On a scale from 1 to 10….. I’d say 7, right now.” Zayn whistles and Harry is visibly shocked. “I auditioned for a leading role in a new trilogy, I was looking forward to, and contract was almost signed. Yesterday I got a formal e-mail telling me they were very sorry, but they had decided to continue auditions for the leading role as I was not entirely what they were looking for and they thanked me for showing interest in the part.”

‘That sucks!” Harry exclaims.

“I also lost a few commercial deals, one of them being the Ferrari commercial. So basically I have nothing right now.” Louis sighs.

“What are you going to do?” Zayn asks carefully.

“Don’t know. Haven’t really thought about it, been too busy dealing with current contracts and avoiding the press. Think I’m going in hiding for a while, until things cool down.” he sighs dramatically.

“You’re quite a pair, the two of you. Both hiding from the outside world, while I’m facing the world.” Zayn glances at the pair of them. Harry can’t help but chuckle.

“You’re a brave man, Zayn Malik. One of the reasons we admire you.” Louis says as he rolls his eyes, Zayn laughs.

“Well, if you hermits decide to make an appearance to the world, call me, I get you tickets to my show.”

They share a couple of drinks before they say goodbye to Zayn and promise to keep in touch. Louis closes the door and says

“I hate those long distance flights, I’m still very much awake, although it’s almost 1 am.”

“Wanna have another drink?” Harry offers, although he knows he shouldn’t, he’s had enough and so has Louis, but hey… they’re both having a “holiday” and nowhere to go, so why not?

“Yeah, let’s do that.” Louis nods and lies down on the couch. Harry sits on the floor in front of the couch and hands Louis another beer.

“You’re having a good time here?” Louis asks him.

“Yeah, it’s a great village, beautiful surroundings and a gorgeous house and I like the peace and quiet for now. You really have to check out your garden tomorrow.” he says looking up at Louis.

“I will, popstar, I certainly will, now that you’ve tempted me with those beautiful pictures.” Louis smiles down at him. “Glad you like it here. I love this place too, just haven’t been here often. I still need to make it …. a home, I suppose.” Harry suddenly remembers something.

“Oh, uhm…. I kind of bought something for you today.” he says a bit timid. Louis’ eyes light up

‘Oooh, a present? I love presents!” Harry chuckles, Louis reminds him of a child on his birthday right now.

“Do you want me to get it for you? Or do you want to wait until tomorrow?” he teases.

“Go get it! What are you waiting for, shoo, shoo?” Louis kicks him softly. Harry goes to the kitchen where the bag with the jug and the frame still stands next to the fridge. He takes both with him and kneels down next to the couch.

“I got this jug… think it would look great in the hall with some flowers from the garden. “He shows Louis the zinc jug he bought at the antique store.

“Yeah, I think you’re right…. good choice, it’s very nice.” Louis admires the jug, his fingers touching the dents in the jug.

“And uhm… this is more personal. When I first came here, I didn’t know which your bedroom was. When I entered the room I saw the picture of you and your siblings on the shelf. Well, I found this today at an antique store, thought you could use it to frame the picture.” he’s a bit nervous, biting his lip as he hands Louis the Victorian picture frame. Louis is quiet for a while, his hands almost caressing the rectangle frame. When he looks up, Harry sees tears in his eyes. Oh fuck, he thinks, what did I do? Louis swallows before he talks

“Harry…. this is lovely. Thank you … so much.” He leans forward and wraps his arms around Harry’s shoulders and hugs him and whispers. “You have no idea how much this means to me. You’re quite something.” Harry leans in and wraps his arms around Louis’ waist and hugs him back.

“Glad you like it.” he says softly. They break apart and Louis gets up.

“Think I’m going to bed now, I feel kind of tired now.” Before Harry can say goodnight, Louis has already left the room. He gets up, turns off the light and goes upstairs. Once in bed he sighs. Relaxing is going to be very difficult the next weeks. Louis is the kind of guy Harry will fall in love with, gorgeous, sweet and funny.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been spending quite some time in the Cotswolds, hence the detailed descriptions of a few places in the story
> 
> I should apply for a job at a TIC in the Cotswolds ;-)

He wakes up early the next morning. A dry throat and a small hammer hitting his scull from the inside reminds him of the night before. He groans, as he gets up and walks down to the kitchen barefoot and in his boxers. He grabs a glass and fills it with water, then gulps it down. He looks through the window. Another sunny day, great day for just lazing around… again. He hears footsteps coming into the kitchen and a grumpy voice saying, what he thinks is "good morning". He looks over his shoulder and sees Louis in his sweatpants and shirtless approaching the sink. Harry grabs another glass and fills it with water, hands it to Louis

“Need this?” he asks, trying to hide his smile. Louis looks like he’s pretty hungover, he accepts the glass of water with a growl and pours it down his throat.

“Remind me why I drank so much…” he’s looking at Harry with sad puppy eyes. Harry grins.

“I’m going to take a quick shower and then I’ll make us a proper English breakfast.” he promises as he tosses some aspirin, taken from the kitchen drawer, to Louis. 

When he gets back, wearing black shorts and a tight white T-shirt, his hair in a ponytail to keep it from getting into his face, Louis is staring through the kitchen door to the garden.

“It really looks pretty from here.” he says as he turns around, but then freezes when he sees Harry. Harry is confused, he didn’t do anything wrong, did he? After all, Louis just talked to him, so he knew Harry was in the kitchen…. or was he just talking to himself and did Harry startle him? Harry smiles at him.

“Yeah, let’s do a tour through the garden after breakfast, you’ll love it.”  

“Right...” Louis says, eyes still focussed on Harry. “I’ll better shower too and test your breakfast making skills then.” And off he goes. Harry shrugs. 

When Louis returns he’s wearing cut-off jeans for shorts and a tight black tank top, showing off his tanned body and revealing more tattoos. His hair still wet and Harry really has a hard time concentrating on preparing breakfast.

“It smells good, even though my stomach doesn’t agree.” Louis says.

“Thanks” Harry says. He puts both plates on the table and pours tea in the cups.

“My Yorkshire tea! “ Louis sighs happily. “One of the things I really miss living in California, tea there is rubbish.”  

“I prefer herbal tea, but yeah what the Americans call tea is wish-wash.” Harry agrees.

“Of course, you’d prefer herbal tea, I should have known.” Louis shakes his head.

“What do you mean by that? “ Harry tries to look offended, but fails.

“You seem the type to do yoga, meditation, herbal tea, organic food.” Louis continues while he sips his tea. Harry blushes, because yeah, he does and likes all of those things.

“Nothing wrong with that.” he defends himself, okay so that may have come out a little stronger than he meant to, because Louis kicks him softly under the table.

“Nothing wrong with that, popstar. I didn’t mean to offend you… I’m sorry. Blame it on my more than slight hangover.” he apologizes.

“I’m not offended, just… well somehow people always seem to make fun of it. Yes, I like organic food, it tastes so much better. I do yoga and meditate because it helps me to relax.” Harry shrugs.

Louis puts a hand on Harry’s arm.

“You’re taking good care of yourself, that’s all that matters. I should take care of myself better than I do, but I guess I do not have the perseverance to keep a lifestyle like that up.” Harry stares at the hand on his arm, it’s warm and soft and yet there is a certain strength in it. Louis quickly removes his hand when he sees Harry staring at it. “So… you’re showing me my garden then?” Louis says as he gets up and puts their plates in the sink. Harry jumps up and opens the door

“After you, sir!” Louis laughs and walks outside, Harry following. Harry shows him his favourite spots in the garden and is endeared by Louis’ reactions, he takes in the smells of the garden, like he’s never been in a garden before. Smiles when a butterfly sits on his chest for a little while before flying over to a rosebush.

“It really is a dream garden. I’ve never been here this time of year and never long enough to really appreciate it.” His face is soft as he looks up to Harry, who’s enjoying himself way too much.

“It truly is beautiful. Who’s your gardener? The garden is well taken care of.” Harry asks as he cuts a few flowers for the jug.

“Ah, well there’s an older man in the village who takes care of it. I saw his ad in the flower shop and the owner of the flower shop assured me Burt, that’s his name, was the man to hire.” 

Louis is taking quite a few naps on a sunbed the rest of the day, enjoying the sounds of his garden playing like a lullaby in his ears. Harry looks up every now and then from his writing and smiles when he hears him snoring softly. He’s writing lyrics to some chords that have been playing in his mind for a few weeks now. He’s made a salad for dinner, he just needs to wake up Louis so he takes a few careful steps to the sunbed and teases Louis with a bird feather, left by a bird on the lawn. Louis scrunches his nose, Harry tries again and chuckles when Louis tries to wipe the tickle away with his hand. Harry tickles under Louis’ chin. Louis grips his hand and opens his eyes.

“A bit of a tease, Styles?” he asks. Harry smiles at him, not trying to release his hand and Louis doesn’t let go.

“Just trying to wake you for dinner.” he says innocently.

“What’s wrong with “Louis, wake up! Dinner’s ready.” Louis says dryly.

“Not as much fun.” Harry admits with a naughty grin. Louis shakes his head, as he releases his grip on Harry’s wrist.

“So what’s for dinner, then?  

“Just a salad, you know the healthy kind with lots of vegetables, tomato and chicken.” Harry replies. “And there’s some white wine in the fridge, if you want.” 

They eat outside.

“What you’ve been scribbling today?” Louis asks, pointing at the papers on the table.

“Lyrics.” Harry answers.

“Can I see?”  Harry nods. “Hmm, whose heart did you break?” Louis asks pointing at the lyrics.

“So many! Haven’t you read the gossip sites?” Harry smirks.

“Yeah, you’re a little heartbreaker from what I’ve read. I just happen to know you’re not really into girls, so who’s the lad? “Louis sits back in his chair. Harry feels like there's some kind of interrogation coming up.

“Nobody.” he says.

“Really? No secret lover? A crush? Come on Styles, a guy like you with your looks, surely there is someone.” Louis insists, as he’s checking Harry out. Harry feels rather hot, his cheeks are heating up. God, Louis has the most beautiful blue eyes in the world and he’s probably just teasing Harry, but fuck, he doesn’t mind being checked out by Louis.

“There’s a dream of someone.” he says a bit shy as he bites his lip, not really sure if he wants to tell, but Louis leans forward, his arms on the table and a soft look in his eyes.

“Tell me, what you are looking for in a man.” his voice is soft as he puts a hand on Harry’s on the table, giving it a little squeeze.

“My dream is someone who will love me for ….me, just plain Harry, not Harry Styles the popstar. Someone who makes me smile, to have fun with and be silly with, but also caring and loving and a nice butt wouldn’t hurt. “He adds to make the conversation a little lighter. Louis softly strokes his hand and says, his voice almost a whisper.

“I hope you’ll find him, you deserve your dream. You’re a good guy.”

“Thanks.” Harry says thankfully. “What about you? I’m not sure if I should ask, but until last week I thought you and Eleanor were a couple.” he’s almost afraid to ask.

Louis sighs heavily and leans back against the chair.

“Oh…. thought you knew all along? Neither Liam nor Niall told you before?” Harry shakes his head. “Right. Don’t know where to start really.” he says a bit nervously.

“You don’t have to, you know. It’s not really my business.” Harry reassures him quickly, he really doesn’t want to make Louis feel uncomfortable.

“I know, but …. I want to. I only figured out my sexuality when I was already auditioning for the Grease movie. They wanted someone to appeal to teenage girls, so coming out was not an option. I figured it was fine at the time, didn’t fancy any bloke anyway. But when Grease became such a huge success, I got offers they would only give to a straight guy : the tough action hero, the popular football guy… so there was no going back unless I wanted to ruin my career in Hollywood and I loved it too much to do so. To dismiss rumours I hired a model to accompany me at public appearances: Eleanor. So there you go I paid for a girlfriend and paid to have sex.” Suddenly he gets up and walks into the house. Harry swallows, not sure if he should go after him, but decides to do so and follows Louis into the house. He’s standing in the hallway, his hands covering his face. Harry takes a deep breath, walks up to him and turns him around. He pulls Louis against his chest in his arms and holds him. One hand stroking his back softly. Louis doesn’t pull back, lets Harry comfort him. After a while Louis pulls back, looking down as he dries the few tears with his hands and whispers “Sorry, didn’t mean to…break down.” he looks up and Harry has to resist leaning in and kissing him.

“It’s okay…let it out. I’m so sorry you have to go through all of this, when in fact you’ve done nothing wrong. Fuck Hollywood.” Harry says whole-heartedly

“I’m gonna go upstairs, if you don’t mind… “Louis looks immensely sad.

“Yeah, of course. “And he lets go of him, watching him walk upstairs. Oh Louis, I wish I could help you, but I don’t know how…. Harry thinks as he locks up. Once in bed he decides he’s going to try to get Louis out of the house little by little, although he knows Louis doesn’t really want to be in public yet, but he’s not going to let him become a recluse.

The next morning he finds Louis already sitting at the breakfast table, sipping tea.

“Hi, sleep well?” he asks Harry.

“Yeah, how about you?” he asks putting a hand on Louis’ shoulder. Louis looks up to him with a small smile.

“Yeah, fine, thanks. There’s tea and toast, if you want.” Harry sits down to enjoy his breakfast, but his phone starts buzzing. He stares at the screen: James. He sighs, Louis looks at him.

“You alright?” he wants to know.

“Yeah, it’s just my manager. I’ll take it in the living room” He gets up and answers the phone. “James! Why are you calling me at this hour of the day?” he accuses his manager. He hears a chuckle at the other end.

“Some people actually work at this hour of the day, Harry!”  

“I’m on holiday, remember?” he replies a bit grumpy.

“Sorry, I know…. it’s just Liam and Niall have some studio time available next week and you said you wanted them to produce the song…. “Harry sighs.

“Alright, yeah, go ahead… make the appointment. Song is finished, so I’m ready to record, besides …. It’ll be good to see them again. “

“Ben wants to know if you already have ideas for the music video. “ James continues.

“Geez! I haven’t even recorded the song yet! What’s the hurry?” Harry gets a little annoyed.

“Hold your horses…. he just asked, that’s all.” James says quickly.

“Well, I do have an idea and you’re not going to like it, but I’m determined to make this song all mine, video and all.” Harry says a bit snappy.

“Ok, I’ll make the appointment with Niall and Liam and we’ll go from there. Enjoy your day.” James ends the phone call. Harry comes back into kitchen and throws his phone on the table, causing Louis to raise his eyebrow.

“Sorry, just work stuff. I’m going to have to go to London to record the song next week… so much for my weeks off. He was already asking about ideas for the music video, pfff.” Harry breathes in frustration. Louis’ face falls.

“Will you be coming back?” he asks a bit hesitant.

“I haven’t thought about it. Guess it depends on how the recording sessions go.” Harry sits down. Fuck, he had not even thought about it, but after next week he only has one week off left.

“I see.” Louis definitely sounds off.

“I’ll try to come back, I really like it here… unless… you don’t want me to?” Harry’s stomach feels tight at the realization maybe Louis doesn’t want him to come back.

“No! No, I want you here!” Louis’ cheeks turn red. “I mean, I like having you around, it’s gonna be awful quiet without you.” he adds quietly.

“Good, then I’ll be back.” Harry confirms with a soft smile playing around his lips.

It’s already after 10 that night, when James calls back. Harry is watching TV while Louis is reading e-mail on his laptop. He’s scheduled to be recording next Thursday and Friday.

“I’ll be gone Thursday and Friday.” he informs Louis. Louis looks up and smiles.

“Only two days to record the song? “He asks.

“Yeah, it’s only the one song, the next single.” Harry tells him as he sits down in front of the telly again.

“Have you thought about the video, like James asked?” Louis shuts his laptop and joins Harry on the couch. Harry bites his lip and nods.

“Yes, but it’s …. not traditional and I don’t think James or my PR people will approve, but I really want to do this.” He tells Louis his idea, he gets really excited about it and Louis is really supportive.

“I think it’s a great idea. Any ideas about who’s going to be the broken hearted boyfriend?” Louis looks at him curiously. Harry knows exactly who he wants. He fiddles with the remote and looks down.

” Yeah I do, but I don’t think he will say yes.” he says shyly.

“Come on… tell me, anyone I know? Or might know from the business? A model? “Louis pries.

“No, no… not a model, although he’s… uhm… very attractive.” Harry looks up and sees Louis looking at him questioningly

“Really? Now you’ve got me curious, popstar! Tell me!” he pokes Harry’s arm.

“You.” Harry whispers quickly.

“Sorry, who?” Louis didn’t hear him.

“I said: You…” Harry repeats. Louis sinks back into the cushions and looks astonished.

“You want me to play the part?” he repeats slowly. Harry looks at him in anticipation.

“Yeah, I really do…” Harry says softly.

“Bloody hell!  Yes…. I’ll do it!” Louis exclaims to Harry’s surprise.

“You sure?” Harry tries carefully, not quite sure Louis understands what Harry just asked.

“Yes, you idiot. Come here! I want to hug you!” Harry’s smile is broad and his dimples are showing when he sees Louis coming to life and excited about the idea. He flings himself towards Louis and hugs him.

 “Thank you so much! I’m so relieved, I really thought you wouldn’t do it.” Harry mumbles into Louis’ ear.

“Never thought about doing music videos, but I like your concept and the out of the box thinking. It’d better be a good song, though.” He playfully tugs on Harry’s curls.

“I’ll let you hear the demo, if you hate it… you can still pull out.” Harry offers sincerely.

“I doubt I hate it, I’ve seen the lyrics and besides…. I have to admit I’m a bit of a fan. “Harry looks at him in surprise. “I … uhm, have your all your cd’s and I’ve seen you in concert three times.” Louis confesses, his cheeks colouring pink.

“Really? Wow! You’re a fan!” Harry teases him. Louis sighs

“I am.” Harry pecks him on the cheek.

“I’m your fan, how great is that? “He smiles.

“We’re idiots!”  Louis states and they both burst out in laughter. 

The next day Harry knocks on Louis’ bedroom door

“Wake up Tomlinson, we’re going out!”

“Jesus, Styles do you know what time it is?” he hears Louis grumbling from the other side of the door.

“Go back to sleep!”  

“Come on, Louis” Harry whines. “I’ve got a surprise for you, get out of bed, please!”  

“Alright, alright…. I’m coming” Louis answers. When he opens the door, Harry has to take a deep breath: a sleepy Louis is a gorgeous Louis, his hair messy, eyes narrow, bare tanned chest and boxers low on his hips.

“What’s the surprise?’’ Louis yawns as he looks at Harry.

“Get dressed and come downstairs.” Harry orders, trying to avoid Louis’ gaze. He has to fight the urge to push Louis back into his room and onto the bed and kiss him senseless.

“Why?” Louis tries again. Okay, so a sleepy Louis is also a trying Louis. Harry turns around to go downstairs and replies

“Just… please do it.” he says. 

When Louis enters the kitchen, Harry can see his eyes grow wide at the look of the fully loaded picnic basket.

“What’s all this?” he asks staring at Harry.

“We’re going out today and have a real picnic.” Harry smiles brightly at him as he places a cup of tea in front of Louis.

“Bloody hell! Who else is coming?” Louis is still staring at the basket.

“Just us, you and me!” Harry answers excitedly.

“You know, that is quite an amount of food for two people, you know that, don’t you?” Louis says as he points to the basket. Harry shrugs

“So what, I got a bit carried away.” Louis grins. 

Once they’re in the car and Harry has put the basket away in the trunk, Louis asks

“And where exactly are we going?”  As he settles in the passenger’s seat of Harry’s rental car.

“We’re going to do the Romantic Road tour.” Harry smiles at him. Louis almost chokes.

“We’re gonna do what?”  

“Come on, Tomlinson, surely you know one of the area’s most idyllic tourist attractions?” Harry answers with a smirk.

“Sorry, can’t say I do. So what’s the romance; you’re going to woo me today?” Louis winks at Harry.

Harry can’t help but blushing as he stammers a “N...No… I mean…. I just…. “and then stops.

“Sorry…. I was just teasing. It’s nice of you to get me out of the house.” Louis apologizes softly as he places a hand on Harry’s arm

“Right that was the idea.” Harry says, still feeling a little uncomfortable. He pushes the stick in first gear and drives off. They sit quiet for a while, none of them really knowing what to say. Louis is the first to talk.

“So where is this tour leading us to? I’m kind of curious now.” he tries. Harry clears his throat.

“There’s a brochure in the glove compartment that shows the route. I thought maybe we could visit the Thomas Kinkade gallery in Broadway and maybe go to the tower?” Louis already picked the brochure from the compartment and nods.

“Sounds good. Ah look, we pass Snowshill, maybe have a look at the lavender fields?”  The drive is fantastic, idyllic, lovely villages with cottages made of golden yellow Cotswold stone, processed from local quarries for over 300 years, rolling hills, bustling market towns, small streams floating through villages with names like Bourton-on-the-Water, twin villages with disturbing names like Upper Slaughter and Lower Slaughter, that has Louis making the comment “You sure you wanna go there ?” And Harry, who studied some of the names of the villages, tells him the names have nothing to do with massacres but mean “muddy place”. It turns out the villages are gorgeous, they do a walk from Lower to Upper slaughter and of course Louis has to open and close a squeaking gate a few times, just to tease Harry who’s absolutely in love with his surroundings.

“You’re a toddler!” Harry accuses him.

Louis grins

“Sorry, guess I never really grew up with so many little sisters surrounding me.” Harry sighs. They continue their tour and visit Broadway where they go into a small Thomas Kinkade gallery and Harry buys a painting called “Tangled” which makes Louis laugh.

“Of course you would buy a fairy-tale painting instead of one of the beautiful classics.” he says as he’s staring at one of the other paintings. Harry whispers something to the owner of the gallery and he nods. Louis’ eyes keep going back to a painting called “Bridge of Faith”, he likes the title, but is mesmerized by the light captured in the painting. When Harry’s purchase is neatly wrapped in brown paper they leave the gallery. Harry finds a Yankee Candle store a little bit further down the street and can’t resist buying a few scented candles, Louis just smiles. He seems to enjoy himself, Harry thinks. Louis buys them chocolates from Hamilton’s Sweetshop next door to the candle store and they leave Broadway smilingly, happy with their purchases and the fact they were only recognized a couple of times, but no one came to them for pictures or autographs, it made them feel like “normal” people.

Just outside Broadway they find a nice spot for their picnic. They can see the Broadway Tower. Louis spreads the blanket and Harry unloads the basket. It’s sunny, but not too warm.

“Wow, this is really good. How did you arrange all of this?” Louis hums happily after tasting a chicken filled sandwich.

“I got it from the bakery. I read they did picnic baskets. “Harry smiles.

“It tastes great!” Louis sighs after he swallowed the last few crumbs of the sandwich. Harry lays down, eyes closed, letting the warmth of the sun touch his face, hands behind his head, and a smile on his lips. It’s just another minute or so when a shadow falls over his face and he feels soft lips touching his lips in a small kiss. He opens his eyes, before he can react Louis already pulled back.

“W...what was that for? “ Harry asks a bit confused. Louis just kissed him, Louis just kissed him!  He feels his heart pounding in his chest. Louis’ cheeks are a bit pink.

“I... just wanted to thank you for today. I’m sorry if this was a bit forward. Are you mad?” Louis looks at him from under his fringe, he’s fiddling with the strings of his hoodie.

“No… no, of course I’m not. It was just …. unexpected, that’s all.” Harry reassures him. He can see relief on Louis’ face. “I’m glad you’re having a good day. I love spending time with you.” he adds and then hopeful and really brave. “I wouldn’t mind another kiss, though.” he hardly dares to look at Louis, when he does, he sees Louis’ cheeks colouring a burning red.

“Better not…” Louis almost whispers. “Think we should be going.” He starts gathering the plates and Harry just wants to hit himself.

“Louis… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that, please… forgive me?” his voice is shaking a bit.

“It’s okay, Harry. Don’t worry about it.” Louis says as he takes the basket to the car. 

They drive back to the cottage in silence. Harry regrets his flirtatious outburst very much. Louis clearly isn’t ready for flirting yet. And it’s there that he decides when he gets to London, he needs to go out and find a nice lad to spend the night with. He hasn’t had sex in ages. It’s probably his sexual frustration that led him to flirting with Louis. He sighs deeply when he pulls the car in the driveway and gets out, taking the basket from the trunk and entering the hall behind Louis. Louis throws his keys in the bowl on the chest and runs upstairs. Harry puts the basket on the kitchen table and goes out again to retrieve the painting from the car. He closes the door behind him and walks upstairs to his room to put the painting away. He is about to walk downstairs when he hears sobs coming from Louis’ bedroom. He turns around and softly knocks on the door. No answer. He tries again.

“Louis, are you alright? “ No answer. “Louis, please, can I come in?” No answer. Harry takes a deep breath and opens the door slowly. He sees Louis curled up on the bed, hands covering his face, his body shaking with the sobs. Harry walks over to the bed and kneels beside Louis on the floor. He slowly strokes Louis’ hair from his face, wiping tears away with his thumb. “Louis, I’m sorry. I can’t help but feeling this is my fault.  I’m so sorry. “He whispers. Louis looks up, tears still in his eyes. He slowly shakes his head.

“No... it’s not you. It’s me. I’m so messed up, I don’t even know how to behave with another guy. “And again tears fall from his eyes. Harry keeps stroking his hair as he swallows the lump in his throat. He really wants to help Louis.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He tries.

“Yeah, but not now, if that’s okay with you. Could you just… lie next to me? I could use a cuddle.” Louis looks up at him shyly. Harry complies. He climbs on the bed next to Louis and wraps both his arms around the man next to him. Louis lets his head rest against Harry’s chest. Harry plants a kiss on top of Louis’ head as he slowly strokes Louis’ back comfortingly. The tension leaves Louis’ body and after a few minutes the sobs stop and Harry can hear a soft snore just below him. He smiles and grabs the blanket that is lying on the chair behind him, carefully as not to disturb Louis who’s deep asleep now. Harry throws the blanket around both of them and holds Louis in his arms as he drifts asleep as well. 

When Harry wakes up, he sees Louis looking at him.

“Hi.” he says softly.

“Hi.” Harry replies with a smile. “How are you feeling?” he asks quietly.

“Better” Louis sighs. “Sorry for all that, I seem to make a habit of breaking down and landing in your arms.” he says apologetic.

“No need to be sorry, that’s what friends are for.” Harry reassures him, still holding him in his arms. Louis obviously doesn’t mind Harry holding him as he makes no attempt to pull away. “What time is it?” he asks.

“Almost 8 pm” Louis answers.

“Hmm, how about ordering pizza and watch a movie downstairs?” Harry yawns. Louis smiles.

“Sounds like a good plan. I’ll order us a pizza and you pick out a movie.” he says as he gets up. 

Half an hour later they’re downstairs in sweatpants and T-shirts, pizza on the table, a bottle of water each and Batman performing his powers on screen. After they’ve finished their take away dinner, Harry takes their plates to the sink and grabs two bottles of beers from the fridge and walks back to the living room, Louis just put the DVD back in its cover and settles back in the corner of the couch, Harry hands him a bottle and sits down next to Louis, one leg on the floor, the other one tucked beneath his butt.

“You know, I’m going to miss you when you leave. It feels nice to have someone around to chat with, laugh with, and do silly things with and …. well, cry with. Although I’m the cry baby all the time. “Louis says as he stares at Harry. Harry smiles and replies with an honest.

“I’ll miss you too. I really like being around you.” Louis smiles.

“I’m sorry to be such a baby, I’m usually not like that at all. Guess this entire shit with the escort has really gotten to me.” he sighs.

“Do you know what you’re going to do? Will you go back to Hollywood?” Harry leans back and waits for Louis to reply. Louis is frowning as if he’s just now thinking about it.

“No….no, definitely not. Not for a long time anyway. “He says resolute. “I’m going to stay in England for a while. I’ve talked to my agent a couple of days ago and she says it’s probably wise to stay and think about what I want in future. I wasn’t happy in Hollywood, I wanted to leave for quite some time before all this happened. Maybe it’s good it came out like it did. I don’t have to hide anymore, no more fake relationship and pretending I’m straight. I’m going to choose me and for now I have no idea what I want, but I have time to find out, look into my options. I still want to do your video, my agent thinks it’s an excellent plan, I texted her.” Louis’ voice sounds serious.

“You should take time. You’ve been working since you were eighteen. I’m sure you’ve got many options. I’m happy you want to do the video with me. It’ll be fun, Ben usually has some great ideas for music videos.” Harry takes a sip from his beer. “Can I ask you something?”  He asks Louis suddenly.

“Yeah, sure what do you want to know?” Louis looks at Harry with his bright beautiful blue eyes, waiting for Harry to fire the question. Harry takes a deep breath.

“If it’s too personal, just say so, okay?” Louis nods slowly. “Have you ever been in a relationship?” Harry can feel himself blushing as he blurts out the question. Louis doesn’t seem very surprised, though. He just smiles and sighs.

“If you mean if I’ve ever been in a true relationship with a man… the answer is: no. I had a girlfriend in high school, but it never felt right. Hannah was a nice girl, but I don’t think I was ever in love with her, more as a friend with benefits, looking back.” he answers while looking at Harry.

“I see….” Harry says and then he blurts out. “That sucks, man!”  Louis smiles.

“Yeah it does.” he confirms. “I never even got to pulling guys at a bar or club, by the time I figured out I liked men, I was already too much of a famous person, not be recognized. I was too scared to be found out, so my only option was a male escort service and hire a model to play my girlfriend in public. So as far as my career I have no clue what I want to do, but as in my private life, I’d love to find a man who will love me for me and not Louis Tomlinson, the actor. Someone to have fun with, go out on dates, spend lazy evenings in front of the telly with, make passionate love with, wake up with in the morning sharing kisses with morning breath. “Louis sighs as he leans back in the pillows and so does Harry on his side of the couch.

“Looks like we want the same thing for our private lives. Better not tell Niall though!” Harry says with a sigh. Louis chuckles.

“Oh God, no! I can already picture him holding auditions for suitable partners, he’ll have a ball!” Louis grins as he looks at Harry and they both burst out in laughter. 

It’s Friday before Harry knows, he and Louis spent every day together, watching movies, going to Dobbie’s Garden Centre in Cirencester to get some additional plants for Louis’ garden. Visiting an antique market in Gloucester, playing board games on rainy afternoons.

It’s still early when Harry turns the car to the M40 towards Oxford. Louis was still asleep, but Harry left him a note telling him he’d be back on Sunday. The drive to London is boring, he ends up in a traffic jam on the M1 near Watford in pouring rain. It is 10 am when he finally arrives at the studio. Liam welcomes him with coffee and a muffin. Niall hugs him and sits next to him, grabbing a muffin from the plate.

“So you’re ready to record the song?” Niall asks while taking a bite from his muffin.

“I am” Harry confirms with a smile. “I want it to have an 80s arena pop/rock sound to it.” Liam and Niall listen carefully as Harry explains what he wants with the song.

“So I guess you’re done with the dance pop, I assume.” Harry nods a yes.

“I really want to do more rock songs. That’s who I am. I’m fed up with the dance songs; I can’t even dance!” he says passionately. Liam grins.

“Sounds like you want to change your image as well, mate.” Liam leans back with his arms crossed in front of his chest. Harry looks up to both of them.

“I do. I’m fed up with the preppy look. I want to be able to wear shirts, tight jeans, and boots. My hair in a tail or a bandana or whatever. Those suits and slacks are just not me.” Harry continues.

“Woah, mate. That’s going to be a big change. Have you talked about this with James? “Niall inquires curiously.

“Yeah, I’ve been pushing the idea since last year and James agrees. He doesn’t know about my idea for the music video though… not yet anyway.” he tells them about his idea and that he already found someone to play his broken hearted partner.

Niall drops his muffin when Harry tells them it’s Louis. Liam just stares at him in astonishment.

“He said yes?!” Liam is still in a bit of shock after Harry’s revelation. Then Niall starts laughing, both Harry and Liam are staring at him with raised eyebrows.

“Mate, this is the best story ever! Your fans and his’ are going to have a fit. I can’t wait to see the vid, it’s going to be a riot!” he snickers.

“Well, yeah. I suppose it’s going to be a bit much for the fans, but I figured if they’re true fans they’ll stick around, if not … too bad. I want to do this, this is me.” Harry says fiercely.

“Uhm, just a note on the side. Louis’ fans know now that he’s gay, but how about your fans?” Liam tries carefully.

“I’ve thought about that. I’ve never said anything about my sexuality, I’ve tried to be as neutral as possible in interviews. So it’s not as I’ve been lying about it; it just confirms my true sexuality.” Harry explains.

“I think it’s great: you have my support!” Liam claps Harry on the shoulder and Niall gives Harry another hug.

The song comes along great, they’ve been playing with the instruments a bit, the studio musicians did a great job and by Saturday night 7 pm “Where do broken hearts go” is finished. They're going out together to a club celebrating the birth of a “new hit single”; Niall is sure it will become no.1.

“Well, well gentlemen, what brings you to this lovely establishment tonight?” Harry hears from behind him. Niall answers raising his glass.

“We’re celebrating Harry’s next no. 1 hit!” Harry starts laughing.

“Hi Nick.” he says. “Niall is convinced we just finished my new no.1 hit single.” Nick hugs him.

“Sounds good, I'd like to have the exclusive on the show! “ Liam shakes his head.

“I knew you would say that, thought you liked Harry for him, not for his songs.” he teases Nick.

“Ah well, my dearest Liam. Harry is adorable, but I do have a very popular radio show to keep the listeners entertained and Harry is our no.1 British artist, so we both profit from playing the song.” Nick winks at Liam. “How’s country life treating you?” he wants to know.

“Excellent! It’s been great so far, I don’t miss the clubbing at all.” Harry beams, Nick shakes his head disapprovingly.

“Twenty three and already behaving like an old man, what happened to the fun-loving youngster?” he sighs, Harry sticks out his tongue at Nick.

“It’s not boring. I have great company.” he defends himself.

“Ah… yes, I read about that. You’ve been spotted with Tomlinson in the country…. what is that all about? Anything I need to know?” He wiggles his eyebrows at Harry. Harry nods a no frantically.

“We’ve become good friends over the past weeks, that’s all, Nick. “He says pointedly. Nick smiles and joins Liam, Harry and Niall. 

Later that night as they leave the club, Harry tags along with Nick like he’s done many times before, as Nick lives nearby and has a guest room. As usual there are paps outside the club, Harry’s trying to shield his eyes from the flashlights; he’ll never get used to that. Being in the country made him almost forget about what his life actually is. Nick wraps his arm around Harry’s shoulder and leads them to the cab and tells the driver his address.

“I almost forgot what it was like in the city.” Harry sighs as he leans back in his seat.

 “Better get used to it again, dear. Another week and you’re back in business.” Nick says. They drink another beer in the living room of Nick’s flat. “So, what’s Tomlinson like and how is he?” Nick asks.

“He’s very nice and funny. I like him. Considering what he’s going through, he’s doing ok. “Harry answers, not wanting to go into details. It’s not his place to hand out info on Louis’ well-being.

“You sure, you just like him? I remember you being a total fan of the guy.” Nick pries. Harry leans forward and looks at Nick.

“We’re friends, Nick. He’s a nice guy with a lot on his plate, right now. So no romance, if that is what you want to know, just friendship.” he says seriously. “Just like you and me. “He adds.

“Damn, just thought I’d ask. You two look good together; the press would be ecstatic covering a romance between the famous actor and the gorgeous popstar. “Nick grins. Harry throws a pillow at Nick.

 “You twat! If you don’t mind I’d like to get some sleep now, so I can head back to my famous actor friend tomorrow.” Harry kicks Nick as he leaves for the guest room. 

The next morning after breakfast he heads back to the Cotswolds. He and Nick just had some toast for breakfast and chuckled over the latest rumours.

“Radio 1 dj Nick Grimshaw leaves with heartthrob Harry Styles: a new romance?” Sugarscape headlines. They even mention Harry being spotted only last week with Louis Tomlinson.

“Looks like they can’t make up their minds and how come you always get away with gay rumours? When you’re spotted with a blonde girl next week, they think she’s your new love interest!” Harry just grins at Nick’s accusing remark.

“Everybody loves me.” he smirks, Nick laughs.

“Text me when you come back to London and … I’m serious about the song, I want the exclusive first airplay for the Breakfast show.”

“I know, I see what I can do, okay? And thanks for letting me stay the night. “Harry answers. The cabdriver drives Harry to his car at the studio. He texts Louis “On my way!” He receives a reply just before he’s about start the engine. “I’m at my mum’s! Left the key under the seat of the rocking chair.” Harry can’t help but feeling a little disappointed. Louis won’t be there when he comes back. He’d been looking forward to telling him about the song. Harry sighs and heads for the M1.

It’s quiet when he gets to the village; a usual Sunday he thinks. What a difference between the hustle and bustle of London and the peace and quiet of the village. He parks the car in the driveway and retrieves the key from under the seat. He makes himself lunch, reads his mail, but feels rather restless. It’s quiet in the house, he misses Louis’ voice and the clutter, none of Louis’ belongings lying around: the house feels rather empty. He texts Louis “I miss you :-( “and sends it. Only after he’s send it, it occurs to him that the text might be a bit much. He sighs, at least he’s honest. “Really? I’ll be back tonight :-)” Louis texts back. Harry smiles. Good, Louis is back tonight. 

He hears the door and a “Honey, I’m home” late that night. Harry chuckles, as Louis comes in with his arms wide open to hug Harry. He complies and hugs him and exaggerates the “I missed you so much.” Louis holds Harry for a while before he lets go of him.

“Did you have a good time in Doncaster?” Harry asks him.

“Yeah, it was good to see them. The twins were eyeing me suspiciously. That’s when I realized how long it had been since they’d seen me. Mum was fussing, as only mums do. “He smiles fondly. “So how was London?” Louis asks him. Harry tells him he finished the song and how happy he is about the sound of it.

“Liam, Niall and I went out after we finished the song to celebrate. That’s where we met Nick Grimshaw ; he wants me to launch my new single at the Breakfast show. “Harry beams.

“Yeah, I saw a picture of you and Grimshaw leaving the club. So… is it true what they say?” Louis asks him hesitantly. Harry looks at him in confusion.

“What do you mean? “He asks cautiously. Louis looks down and blushes.

“N... Nothing… just… nothing.” Harry can see Louis is embarrassed. He suddenly understands what Louis was going to ask. He takes a step back and takes a deep breath.

“The answer is no. We’re just friends, just like you and me.” He turns around and walks to the kitchen. He’s a bit annoyed. Louis of all people should know it’s nothing but gossip. He takes two beers from the fridge and walks back. Louis is still standing in the middle of the room, fiddling with the zipper of his hoodie. He looks up at Harry, his cheeks are still red.

“I’m … sorry. Even if you were, it’s none of my business.” he almost whispers. Harry just stares at him.

 “Right.” he says, still a bit annoyed.

“I’m going to get my things from the car. “ Louis turns around. Harry puts both bottles on the table and sits down, reads a few texts and answers them. One is from James, informing him his flight is one day earlier, so now he has only three days left. When Louis returns, Harry looks up at him and says

“I’m leaving on Thursday, flying back to LA.” Louis’ face falls. He sits down nervously.

“Oh…” is all he says. They drink their beers, each buried in their own thoughts. The silence feels tense.

 “I’m off to bed.” Harry says as he gets up.

“Goodnight Harry…” he hears Louis saying as he closes the door. After a while he hears footsteps on the stairs and the door on the other end of the corridor opening and closing. Harry sighs, he’s not really sleepy. He regrets his snappy comment. Another sign that he, himself is still not rested well enough, he doesn’t even look forward to going back to work. Louis is still trying to get a grip on his own life, he really didn’t need Harry to snap at him like he did.

The next few days are awkward to say the least. Harry knows Louis is trying to avoid any confrontation. There are uncomfortable silences, at least that is how Harry experiences their lack of conversation. On Wednesday Louis is clearly on edge. He’s nervous, drops things and is on the verge of tears. Harry has just packed his bags for the flight to LA. He walks downstairs and finds Louis sitting on the steps of the porch his hands in his hair. Harry swallows the lump in his throat. He never meant to let things go this bad after Sunday night, he tried to act normal, but something in Louis changed. He quietly sits down next to him.

“Louis… “He softly pokes Louis’ shoulder with his. “what‘s wrong? Please talk to me, I don’t want us to part like this.” Harry whispers. Louis groans.

 “It’s me, okay. Like I said I don’t know how to behave with other guys. Everything I say or do just comes out wrong. It’s making me nervous, sad and frustrated.”

“Oh Louis, I never meant for this to happen. I’m sorry about Sunday night. I wouldn’t have reacted like that if I had been rested, but as it is I’m still tired and I really don’t want to go back to LA, but I have no choice. It’s being back in London with the paparazzi around that reminded me of how I much I hate that and that I had to go back to that life in less than a week. I’m afraid I took it out on you. It’s not your fault. You’ve been great. Even though you have your own problems to deal with, you let me stay and you’ve been a great friend. I’m so very sorry for these past days. I didn’t know how to make things right again.” His eyes are wet by the time he finishes speaking. Two blue eyes are looking up at him and he feels a pair of arms around his waist. They sit like that for a while, apologizing to each other.

“How about we go out for dinner tonight?” Louis asks him, still holding Harry’s waist as he looks up again. Harry smiles at him.

“I’d love that.”

“Good.” Louis smiles back. “Let’s get changed, I’ll make reservations.”

The waiter takes their order and brings a bottle of wine.

“I can’t believe you’re leaving. It’s going to be awfully quiet in the house. “Louis sighs. Harry raises his eyebrows.

“Are you implying I’m a noisy person?” Louis looks at him with a grin.

“Only when you play the guitar.” he teases. Harry laughs.

“Yeah, I get carried away sometimes.” he admits. “Oh, I almost forgot. The single will be released in three weeks. Ben wants to do a few shots of us together. The other parts can be filmed separately. The production company will contact your agent.” Harry beams. He’s so happy about the way the single turned out and that his script for the music video is approved of. Ben did a few adjustments. One of them being a very intimate scene; Harry has been putting off telling Louis about the scene, but this is his last chance to tell it in person.

“Okay.” Louis says. “Anything you can tell me about the scenes?” Harry blushes. Right, so this is it.

“Uhm, well mostly it’s us having fun going out, having dinner, making love.” Louis almost chokes on his wine.

“You mean there’s a bed scene?” Harry’s feeling very warm right now, he can feel the blush creeping up in his neck.

“Uhm yeah… Ben put it in. Is that a problem? “Harry is suddenly concerned, what if Louis refuses?

“No… nope, not a problem… just unexpected is all. Done quite a few of those scenes in movies.” Louis runs a hand through his hair. “So what else?” he continues.

“Well there’s a scene with me and another bloke.” Harry’s getting warmer and warmer. Louis smirks.

“Ah, the one you’re cheating with on me.” Harry grins.

“Yep, Ben says he’s got a blonde Scandinavian model to play that part. “ Louis laughs.

“So blond, tall and a model; quite the opposite of your boyfriend. “ Harry nods and smiles. He’s missed this the past few days, just him and Louis having fun together. “Looking forward to the shooting, should be fun.” Louis says content.

“I’m kind of dreading it, never done this kind of a shoot. “ Harry admits.

“It’s not that bad. When it comes to the bed scene, just think of something silly like a grocery list. Works for me. “Louis advices.

“I’ll keep that in mind, thanks for the tip.” Harry replies thankfully.

“I’m there alright, I’ll help you get through that scene, don’t worry about it. “ Louis covers Harry’s hand with his, in reassurance. Harry smiles at him.

“Thanks.” he says softly.

When they get home, Harry puts the last of his belongings together and leaves all of his luggage in the hall. Louis is standing in the living room.

“So this is it then… you’re leaving.” his voice sounds strange, unnatural.

‘Yeah, I am, can’t believe it myself. Thanks for letting me stay. I had a great time. It was nice getting to know you, I consider you my friend.” Harry says. He hardly recognizes his own voice, as if someone else is talking and he’s just miming. Louis is struggling. Harry can see he wants to ask something but lacks the confidence. “Come here” Harry whispers as he closes the gap between their bodies, wraps his arms around the smaller man. “I’m going to miss you so much. “ Harry confesses softly in Louis’ ear.

“I don’t want you to go, I know I’m gonna miss you much too.” Louis admits in a whisper.

“It’s only a few weeks before the video shoot, we’ll meet then”. Harry says, but he knows it’s just not the same. This cottage was theirs, away from the gossip, the showbiz, the paparazzi: their own little bubble.

“I know, still don’t like it though.” Louis holds Harry’s waist firmly as he mumbles the words. Harry presses a soft kiss on Louis’ forehead.

“We’ll keep in touch, right?” Louis nods. Then Harry lets go and slowly walks upstairs, followed by Louis. On the landing they look at each other.

“Goodbye Harry, have a safe trip.” Louis says.

“Goodbye Louis.” They both enter their bedrooms.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter: hope you enjoyed the story. Thanks for reading !
> 
>  
> 
> [here's the tumblr post](http://noellehenry.tumblr.com/post/148258199139/beside-you-by-noellehenry-summary-au-where-harry)  
> 

LAX is dreadful, busy and hot. It gets to Harry’s mood. He bumps into a man, because he’s not paying attention, he just wants to get to the exit as soon as possible.

“Sorry, sorry I didn’t see you.” The man turns around and Harry is met with the most beautiful brown eyes he’s ever seen, his mouth almost drops open. The man looks at him and smiles.

“It’s okay, I’m still standing, no harm done.” He’s got a deep voice and a nice smile.

“Good, well … glad to hear that. I’m Harry, by the way. “Harry offers his hand to the stranger.

“I know who you are. I’m Matt. Nice to meet you.” Then he turns around and walks off with a few other men. He turns around and makes a small wave at Harry. Shit… wow! Harry thinks. And then there’s a hand on his shoulder.

“James!” Harry hugs him. “Geez Harry, you’re not even out of the airport and you’re already flirting with a guy.” James teases him.

“Ugh, it’s just been too long. I’ve been quite the celibate since I took my vacation.” Harry groans, that sounded pathetic, he thinks. 

The rented apartment is okay, nice view over the beach. He opens a window to let in the soft sea breeze, opens the door to the balcony and takes out his phone. Liam added him to a celeb friends app.

_“Celeb friends, seriously?_ _“_ That’s Louis’ text.

_“Yeah, I_ _’m a celeb!_ _”_ Niall, obviously.

_“I_ _’m in LA_ _”_ he texts. Immediately there’s a reply from Liam.

_“Good trip?_ _”_

_“Arrival at the airport was better, bumped into the most gorgeous man on earth!_ _”_ he texts back.

_“Zayn?_ _”_ Louis replies. Harry chuckles

_“Ok, so second most gorgeous. His name is Matt, that_ _’s all I know_.” he texts.

_“And you let him go?_ _”_ Niall wants to know.

_“Yup, he left with friends :-(_ _“_ Harry replies. _“Gonna take a nap now._ _”_ Harry locks off the phone and goes inside. Soon he’s asleep. 

The next day he’s collected by James. They’re heading to the studio to record another song for the new album.

“Hey Harry, nice to have you back. “ Julian greets him.

“Good to be back, looking forward to recording this song.” Harry replies.

“So I heard you already recorded a song with Liam and Niall?” Julian asks. Harry nods

“Yeah, I’m very happy with the song, it’s going to be the first single of the new album, and we’ll be shooting the music video soon.” Julian smiles at him.

“Ok, so let me introduce you to the musicians.” Harry smiles when he sees a familiar face.

“Matt, right?” he says as he shakes the guy’s hand.

“Hello Harry, so we meet again.” Matt looks amused.

“You guys met before?” Julian inquires curiously.

“Well, kind of. I tried to knock him over at the airport yesterday.” Harry explains with a grin. They all laugh.

“Ok, well Matt plays the bass.” 

At the end of the day, Harry has gotten to know the musicians a bit and they have a drink at the bar in the studio. He kind of likes Matt, the guy is laid back, smiling a lot and a good bass player, not to mention his beautiful eyes and he’s fit ….. And Harry hasn’t been with a guy in a long time. It takes him another day to finally make a move.

“Uhm Matt, you wanna go out tonight?” he asks when they sit at the bar.

Matt looks up at him and smirks “Are you asking me out on a date, Styles?”

“I am… so what do you say?” Harry winks at him.

“Yes.” Matt gives him a big smile. They go to one of LA’s most popular clubs. One of the perks of being famous: you don’t have to wait in line or wait for an introduction. They spend the night enjoying a few drinks and dancing. Matt is a good dancer and Harry has trouble keeping up with him. Matt pulls him close for a slow dance, moving his hips in dirty circles against Harry’s thighs and Harry feels arousal pooling in the pit of his stomach. Matt pulls his head down for a kiss, Harry kisses him back fervently and soon the kisses become sloppy and dirty. Harry knows everyone can see him snogging a guy, but he doesn’t care, all he knows is there’s a fit guy grinding against him and Harry wants him.

“Toilets?” he pants in Matt’s ear. He doesn’t get an answer, but is pulled through the crowd towards the men’s room and before he knows it he’s in a stall, pushed against the wall and Matt is on his knees in front of him, unzipping his pants. His lets out a groan when he feels a warm hand gripping his cock, the head already leaking precome from the friction at the dancefloor. Matt’s not wasting any time, he takes Harry in his mouth and covers the remaining part of his cock with his hand. He starts bobbing his head up and down and…. geez, Harry feels like a teenager all over again, it has been way too long, because he feels close to coming within what feels like seconds to him. He warns Matt and he pulls off, just in time. Harry can feel himself shooting his load on Matt’s face.

“Jesus, that was quick… I’m sorry!”  He breathes. He grabs toilet paper to wipe Matt’s face clean. “It’s been a while.” he feels the need to explain. Matt just smiles as he gets up and kisses Harry.

“It’s ok… I didn’t last long either.” and he looks down, Harry too.

“Oh my… I didn’t even touch you.” Harry says a bit surprised.

“Nope, it’s been a while for me too. “ Matt sighs. “You wanna come to my place?” Matt asks him. Harry nods. Outside they’re photographed… of course… well, so be it, Harry thinks. He will deal with that tomorrow. They take a taxi to Matt’s place ….

It’s like he thought, lots of speculation about him and the guy he was leaving the club with. He sighs and turns the phone off so he can get some sleep before he’s harassed by his PR agency and James and others…

At 9 am, after he’s showered and had breakfast the doorbell rings, he presses the button of the intercom when he sees James outside.

“Hi James, come on up! I’ve got coffee waiting for you.” He walks to the door to let him in and grins at him. James shakes his head as he hugs Harry

“You menace! Have you got any idea, how many phone calls I already received, regarding your night out?” he glares at Harry.

“Uhm... too many?” Harry replies with an innocent face.

“So who’s the guy?” James wants to know.

“Matt is his name and he’s one of the musicians on the next record.” Harry replies dutifully. “I don’t want to make a big deal out of it, just keep the press guessing about my sexuality. If this thing with Matt is turning out to be serious, they’ll know soon enough.”

“Right. So we just stick to the plan, no questions about your private life then. “James notes when they’re in the car.

“Yup. I’ll call Matt, see how he’s doing.” Matt picks up after the second ring.

“Hi. “He sounds cheerful.

“Hi, how are you doing?” Harry asks carefully.

“Considering I’m suddenly the mystery guy and everyone wants to know who I am….. I’m fine. Seriously Harry, don’t worry about it. I knew what could happen if I went out with someone famous.” he reassures Harry. Harry lets out a sigh of relief.

“Phew, so you’re not put off by all this?” He asks.

“Nope. You’re not going to get rid of me that easily.” Matt answers. Harry tells him about the series of interviews he has to do today, but that he will see him tonight. Again, he shuts the phone off.

The recording sessions run smoothly, Harry’s got four songs almost finished. His spare time is spent with Matt, who now almost lives in Harry’s apartment. They haven’t been seen out together, they spend most of their time together indoors or on the beach and they work together during the day at the studio. Matt tells him about his family and friends, his life and Harry tell him about his family and friends in return.

"So you've been spending time with your family when you were missing in action last month?" Matt smiles at Harry as they sit on the couch a few days before Harry has to go back to London.

"Oh no, I've been spending those weeks with Louis... he’s  ... uhm... a good friend of mine.” Harry corrects him quickly with a blush on his cheeks. He avoids mentioning Louis' last name, but doesn't know why, really. Matt raises his eyebrows at Harry's reply, but doesn't comment.

 

*********

 

“I’ll be back in a few days. I’ll text you when I come back.” Harry kisses Matt goodbye and jumps in the car with James: on the way to the airport for a flight to London. Of course it’s raining when Harry arrives in London. Harry and James leave their things at the hotel before meeting Ben.

“Hey Harry!” Ben claps Harry on the shoulder and shakes James’ hand. “Ready for the shoot?”

“Think so, what are we shooting today?” Harry asks as he takes a seat in the dressing room. Lou already circling around him with brushes and pencils.

” We’re shooting the solo shots of you today and the shot with Marcus. Louis’ shots have been taken last week. Tomorrow we’ll do the shoots of you and him together.” As usual Harry is a bit nervous doing video shoots; acting is not quite his thing, it always makes him feel uncomfortable and insecure. Ben is directing and all in all it’s not a bad day. Marcus turns out to be a bit of a prick, complaining about how they should have shot him from the left side, being his “good” side. Harry just shakes his head after hearing the discussion and finally interferes.

“If you don’t wanna do this, just say so. We’ll find someone else, okay. I’m tired and so are the others, can we just finish this?” He turns around and sees Ben winking at him. Marcus gives in and half an hour later they’re done for the day. He has dinner with James at the hotel and has an early night. Matt calls him later when he’s watching TV in his room.

“Hi, miss me?” he asks.

“Absolutely.” Harry smilingly confirms.

“So how did the shoot go?” Matt inquires. Harry sighs deeply.

“Most of my solo shots went fine. It’s just that last shot of the day…. man, that model I had a shot with today was a dickhead. Glad that shot is done. Only one day left: shooting with Louis, really looking forward to working with a professional actor.” Harry tells Matt.

“Tomlinson?" Matt's voice sounds different.  

"Tomlinson." Harry replies.

"Really? You’re doing the video with Louis Tomlinson? You never told  _me_! Get me an autograph!” Matt orders him. Harry chuckles.

“So… you’re a fan? You never told  _me_!” he teases Matt.

“Well, yes! I’ve seen the Alive series a dozen times, he’s brilliant!” Matt confirms.

“Well… let’s see if I can get an autograph for you.” he says.

“I’ll reward you!” Matt says using his bedroom voice. Harry swallows.

“I’ll make sure I’ll get you his autograph.” They talk for a while longer and if there’s some physical action on both sides of the line, no one has to know. 

When Harry arrives at the studio, Louis is already there. Harry hugs him.

“Good to see you again!” he tells Louis.

“You too, I missed you.” Louis says softly.

 “Well, I’m here now and I’m sure by the end of the day you’re glad to get out of here, I’m a lousy actor!” Harry grins. Louis looks at him with a serious look in his eyes.

“Are you nervous?” he asks as he lays a hand on Harry’s forearm.

“I always am at video shoots, nothing new… well maybe, that one scene.” Harry bites his lip.

“We’ll get through it together, don’t worry.” Louis reassures him. Lou calls them. When they’re both in the dressing room Harry asks him

“How have you been? What have you been doing?” There’s a long pause before Louis answers.

“I’m alright. I’ve doing some soul searching. Been looking into getting a degree to teach drama.“

“Really? That sounds cool! You want to give up acting?” Harry is a bit confused. They had never discussed that option.

“Not entirely, but I’d really like to get all my options clear before making a decision. I've also been looking into musicals, here in West End. There are auditions soon for a few parts. Maybe I’ll try that.” Louis continues.

“Wow, you’re really looking into all kinds of possibilities. Good for you!” Harry praises him.

“How about you, haven’t heard from you much.” Louis says, voice even.

“Been recording a lot. Have four more songs ready. It’s a different sound, more rock, less pop. I really like the new sound. Oh that reminds me, one of the studio musicians is a fan of yours. I said I’ll get him your autograph?” Louis laughs.

“Alright…. what’s his name?” he asks as he picks up a pen and a paper.

“Matt.” Harry says softly. Louis looks up at him curiously.

“Wasn’t that the name of the guy you almost knocked over at the airport?” his voice sounds strange. Harry nods. He doesn’t know why he just doesn’t tell Louis, Matt’s his boyfriend. He just can’t seem to bring himself to explain.

“Alright…., here you go.” Louis hands Harry the paper with his autograph.

“Thanks, he’ll be thrilled.” Harry says a bit hesitant. The air between them is tense all of a sudden. Lou finishes their make-up and both men go into the studio. Some scenes will be filmed outside and the last scene will be filmed in the studio. They’re filming at Regent’s Park where the cameraman is being chased by a swan, they film in a restaurant and at a nightclub. As the day passes, both Louis and Harry are getting more relaxed around each other, the tension has subsided and they have quite a few laughs.

Back at the studio, Harry is getting nervous again. The dreaded scene is about to be filmed. He’s only wearing his boxers and a robe and so is Louis. They’re both waiting to be called in. Harry is the first to enter the studio, transformed into a highly romantic bedroom. He swallows, there are lights everywhere blinding him and way too many people, he freezes. Louis bumps into him.

“Hey...what’s wrong?” he whispers.

Harry turns around to face Louis, sheer panic in his eyes as he chokingly admits “I don’t think I can do this. All the lights, all those people. “Ben calls them. Louis guides Harry towards the director.

“Ready guys?” Ben asks, looking a bit worried after seeing the fear in Harry’s eyes.

“Uhm, actually Ben, can we just have a talk?” Louis looks at Ben pointedly. Ben seems to understand. “How many people do you really need to be present for this scene?” Ben immediately understands what the problem is.

“I could do it with one cameraman and myself…” he carefully answers. Harry sighs in relief. Louis turns to Harry.

“Are you okay with that?” he asks as he rubs Harry’s back softly with his hand.

“Yeah, yeah, that would be alright.” Harry’s voice sounds less tense. So Ben makes his staff leave the room, then turns back to his cameraman and Harry and Louis and tells them what he wants to do. Louis nods, like the professional he is, understands immediately what Ben wants from them. Harry feels a slight panic coming back to him. Louis notices and takes Harry’s hand and leads him to the bed in the middle of the makeshift bedroom, sits Harry down and looks at him.

“Look Harry, I know you’re dreading this scene. I promised I will take you through this and I will. I just need you to relax and try to think of something like a shopping list like I suggested before or perhaps something silly, that will take the pressure off. Can you do that?”

Harry isn’t convinced, but he’s willing to try so he says “Yes.” Louis turns his head and nods at Ben. He takes the robe off and slides into bed under the white sheets, Harry does too. Ben gives Louis instructions first and then tells Harry what he wants to film. They’ll be shooting from their torso up, Harry lying on top of Louis, kissing him. Harry hesitates, but with all the courage he can muster, he carefully places himself on top of Louis, avoiding their crotches to touch, but that seems to be bit of a problem.

When Louis whispers “It’s fine, don’t worry, just try to act naturally.” Harry lowers himself carefully. Louis pulls Harry’s head down so they can kiss, the cameraman is circling around them; Harry tries to forget about him and Ben and focuses on what he’s supposed to do. He kisses Louis slowly, his body tense and his arms shaking as he tries to think of the suggested grocerielist. Then suddenly he hears Ben say “CUT”. He looks up.

“Okay Harry, this isn’t going to work. You need to focus, act like Louis’ your boyfriend.” Ben says as he runs his hand through his hair. Harry is sure, they’re never going to shoot this scene.

“I’ll try, I want to… it’s just... “He doesn’t finish his sentence.

He shoots Louis an apologetic look. Ben talks to the cameraman and they’re back shooting. Harry hardly has time to think of what to do, because Louis is pulling his head down and starts kissing him, like he means it and Harry is slowly losing himself in the kiss as he feels Louis’ hands running over his back, his tongue asking permission to enter Harry’s mouth and before Harry knows they’re snogging properly. He lets his hands roam over Louis’ body and moves his hips, causing Louis to moan softly. Harry totally forgets about his surroundings and what he’s here to do. He moves his hips again, looking for friction. Louis meets his moves. The kisses become dirty and Harry feels his cock fill up and then Louis freezes. Harry looks up in confusion. OH SHIT! He sees Ben and the cameraman with open mouths and Louis’ cheeks deep red.

“Oh fuck! I’m… “He moves away from Louis and gets off the bed as quickly as possible and disappears in the dressing room, locking the door.

Oh shit, he fucked up… big time! There’s no way he can ever face any of them again. Poor Louis, how embarrassing that must have been for him. He hears a knock on the door.

“Who is it?” he asks slowly.

“It’s me, can I come in… please?” he hears Louis’ voice from the other side of the door. Harry takes a deep breath before he opens the door. He’s in his boxers, just like Harry.

“Hi” he says softly.

“Hi” Harry replies.

“Are you okay?” Louis asks as he looks Harry in the eye, a soft look, not angry or annoyed at all.

“No… you?” Louis shakes his head.

“Louis… I’m sorry. I said I’m lousy at acting, I didn’t mean to embarrass you… or myself, for that matter.” Harry sighs deeply.

“Harry, it was my fault. I tried to have you act naturally. “He apologizes.

“Well, then you succeeded…I forgot this was supposed to be pretending, I really lost myself in our snog. God… how embarrassing!” Harry pulls at his curls.

“I’m sorry… if it makes you feel better; it wasn’t all acting on my part either. I got hard too, that’s why I froze. It never happened to me before in scenes I filmed in the past.” He sits down on the couch looking panicked. “I promised I would help you through this …. and now look at us…. some promise.” Louis rubs his face with both hands. They sit in silence for a few moments, both in their own thoughts.

“Ben says, he’s got enough film, so we can get dressed and get out of here.” Louis informs him softly.

Louis takes Harry to a bar for drinks.

“So… when are you going back to LA.?” Louis asks while he plays with the cap of the coke bottle.

 “Tomorrow.” Harry answers.

“Oh...can’t you stay one more day? I mean… Zayn got tickets for us for his concert at the O2 tomorrow night. “Louis’ voice sounds hopeful. Harry really wants to see Zayn, but he’s confused, frustrated, he needs to get back to Matt, so he declines.

“Sorry...tell him another time, okay?” he answers. Louis is clearly hurt.

 “I take it you want to see your boyfriend then.” his face is blank, voice sounds strangled.

“Yeah, I want to go back to Matt.” Harry admits almost whispering.

“It’s serious then?” Louis still doesn’t look at him.

“I really like him, I want this to work. He’s great.” Harry says.

“Okay… I’ll tell Zayn you said hi. Have a good flight and thanks for the opportunity to star in your music video.” And with that Louis leaves. Harry doesn’t even have the chance to say goodbye. He’s confused and hurt. He finishes his drink and goes back to the hotel.

 

*****

 

On his flight back to LA he lets the last scene of the shoot repeat over and over again in his mind.

“Fuck” he thinks. “What would have happened if Louis hadn’t stopped us?” He suddenly is aware of the fact that he was snogging Louis Tomlinson and not even pretending. He’d meant it. He was turned on by him and if he was not mistaken Louis felt the same. After all, hadn’t he confessed he’d never sported a hard one in a love scene before?

"Fuck." he mutters to himself. What was happening to him? He should be over the moon to go back to Matt, instead he’s pondering over a heated love scene with his friend for a music video. He falls asleep, but even in his dream the blue eyes and soft lips of a certain movie star take over his thoughts. 

Matt’s out when Harry arrives. It’s kind of a relief, really. He needs a couple of hours to himself. He rings James, who’s still in London arranging a few appearances on TV shows for him. Matt comes in late in the evening, having spent time with his friends.

“Harry! I missed ya!” he wraps his arms around Harry’s waist and kisses him. Harry kisses him back, feeling a bit guilty, he puts extra effort in the kiss.

“Wow, looks like you missed me too.” Matt grins as he holds Harry close.

“Yeah, I have.” Harry says, not totally honest. Matt leads him to the bedroom and closes the door. He starts to undress Harry and soon they’re on the bed, finding their rhythm… 

The next morning Matt’s already up and in the kitchen making breakfast when Harry wakes up. His body is still trying to get into the time zone, he moves from the bed, puts on some sweatpants before heading to the kitchen.

“Morning darling.” Matt greets him cheerfully.

“Morning.” Harry yawns and sits down at the breakfast counter. Matt puts two plates on the counter and asks

“Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah, just trying to get back in the time zone. “ Harry yawns... again. Matt picks up his phone to check his mail and Twitter. Harry sips from the hot coffee, looking through the window from his seat at the counter, the view is fantastic. He hears Matt mutter a “holy shit” next to him.

“What’s wrong?” he asks him, a bit concerned. Hopefully nothing wrong with Matt’s family or friends.

 “Uhm… maybe you want to check this yourself, it’s trending on Twitter.” Matt looks at him worriedly. Harry picks up his phone from the counter and turns it on. Except for dozens of texts by various people, there are loads of mails in his inbox, he decides to check Twitter first and when he logs on, he feels sick, he claps a hand over his mouth as he reads a DM sent by Zayn. It’s an embedded tweet with a picture of Louis in bed, sheets covering the lower part of his body. Apparently he’s asleep. The additional text reads “the worst shag ever”, tweeted by someone called “grant_barrow”. Zayn mentions he doesn’t know much, since Louis isn’t answering his phone, but that he will keep trying. He also has texts from Liam and Niall asking him if he knows something since it was only two days ago he saw Louis.

“Fuck!” Harry whispers. Matt watches him.

 “You okay?” he asks carefully.

“Well, yes... no. Damn it, why would anyone do this? As if Louis hasn’t got enough on his plate already!  What a bastard!” he spits out.

“I agree, it’s hideous, what a dickhead!” Matt says. “Are you going to contact him?”  

“Well, according to Zayn he doesn’t answer his phone, so we’re a bit at a loss. Zayn is his best friend.” Harry explains, a frown between his eyebrows.

“Well, let me know if you hear anything, I feel kind of bad for him, knowing he’s your friend. I’m off to the studio. “He kisses Harry on his forehead as he leaves the room. Harry sighs, decides to take a shower and then read all of the other texts and mails.

By noon, he’s done with the mails and texts, most of them being work related. He sighs. He looks at the time and then on impulse looks for a certain contact and presses “call”. He’s about to end the call when he hears a voice “hello?” Harry clutches the phone to his ear and answers, his voice shaking a bit.

“Louis? It’s Harry.”

“Oh…hi” Louis replies, his voice sounding dull.

“Just checking to see how you are …” Harry says quietly.

“Oh… well… shit, if you must know.” Louis sounds annoyed.

“I’m sorry… will you be okay?” he asks.

“Probably someday, not any time soon, I imagine.”

“Anything I can do for you?” Harry is willing to do everything he asks for.

“A bit difficult, since you’re in LA, right? So… no.” Louis replies firmly.

“If I were in England…?” Harry tries carefully.

“Well… a cuddle, some company and your cooking skills would be great, but that’s just wishful thinking on my part…” Louis sounds sad. “Thanks for calling….I’ve got to go.” Louis ends the call, Harry sits there, phone in his hand.

He walks to the balcony, pacing up and down and makes a decision. He rings the airline, books a flight. Good thing he hasn't unpacked yet. He rings Matt to inform him of his plans and he gets an unexpected reply

“I knew you would go back: you love him, Harry. I appreciate your attempt to make us work, but you’re really in love with him, so I’m letting you go… No hard feelings.” Harry is flabbergasted.

“What the? What makes you say that?” he manages to let out.

“The way you talk about Louis, your entire face is glowing, the fondness, the love for him is written all over your face, Harry: really, you’re a bad actor.” Matt chuckles.

“I don’t know what to say, Matt. I really wanted us to work, but you’re right. I do like Louis a lot… always have, don’t know if it’s going anywhere… All I know is I have to see him, support him.” They say their goodbyes and Harry has to sit on the couch for a while to process the phone call.

“Jesus, he knows me better than I know myself. “He says to no one in particular. He then phones Zayn.

“Harry, good to hear from you!” Zayn answers his phone. They chat for a bit about Zayn’s tour before Harry informs Zayn of his plans.

“Do you know where he stays?” Harry asks.

“At the cottage, I’m sure.” Right, the cottage. 

Again he’s on the plane; back to England. Besides Zayn, Matt and James no one knows. When the plane lands it’s early in the morning in London. It’s raining…. great. He rents a car at the AVIS desk at the airport and an hour later he’s on the M1 heading north, wipers on full speed and BBC Radio 1’s Breakfast show on the radio, Nick Grimshaw babbling in the background. Harry sighs, somehow this feels good, being back in England, rain in London, BBC radio, dry stone walls along the road … it’s home!

It’s still early when he arrives at the cottage. Louis’ car is in the driveway, Zayn was right. Harry takes a deep breath as he closes the car door and walks up to the front door. The door-knocker announces his arrival, Harry is nervous, doesn’t know what to expect, maybe Louis doesn’t want him here, after all they parted tensely a few days ago. 

The door opens, in front of him stands a tired-looking young man in black sweatpants and a maroon hoodie, hair dishevelled, his blue eyes dull, stubble on his chin. His eyes widen when he sees his visitor.

“Harry ….?” it’s almost a whisper. “W...what…. are you doing here? “He stammers. Harry has to swallow, Louis looks so small and hurt, and all he wants to do is pull him in his arms.

Instead he asks quietly “Hi… uhm… can I come in, it’s a bit wet outside?”  Louis nods and lets him pass before closing the door. They walk into the living room.

“You want some tea?” Louis asks.

“Yes, that would be lovely, thank you.” Harry thanks him politely. He sinks down on the couch. Everything is so familiar around him, it feels good to be back. Louis comes back with two mugs and hands Harry one.

“So… as I asked before what are you doing here?” Louis sits at the chair near the fireplace and looks at Harry expectantly.

“I’m here for you, if you want me to. After what you said on the phone, I couldn’t stay away.” Harry puts his mug down and looks up at Louis.

“You mean…. you came all the way back… just for me?” Louis looks at him in disbelief. Harry gets up and takes the few steps from the couch to Louis’ chair and kneels down in front of him, takes the mug from Louis’ hands and places it on the table. He takes Louis’ hands in his and takes a deep breath.

“Yes, I came back for you. I wanted to because I care about you … a lot. I want to take care of you, support you, hold you, be with you… I think… no… I know, it’s what I’ve always wanted. Louis…. I love you, always have if I’m honest.” Harry didn’t think he was this brave, but it’s out now. He sees all kinds of emotions switching on Louis’ face. Louis’ mouth opens, but nothing comes out. So Harry asks almost in a whisper, not daring to look Louis straight in the eye. “Please, say something.”

He doesn’t expect what’s coming. Louis removes his hands from Harry’s and stands up. He runs a hand through his hair and looks at Harry with his hand in his neck.

“Jesus, all this time? Why didn’t you say something sooner? Bloody hell, I wouldn’t have been in the mess I am in now.” Harry stares at him completely confused.

“What do you mean? I don’t understand.” He gets up so he’s on eye level with Louis. Louis throws his hands in the air in frustration.

“You idiot! I’ve wanted you from the first time we met. All these years I’ve been pining over you. Being in the closet, I couldn’t let you know I liked you. When the escort mess erupted, I suddenly had to face reality, no more covering my sexuality. I wanted to come here, be with you, getting to know you. Pathetically, I didn’t know how to behave around you. I didn’t want to scare you. Even if you didn’t like me in a romantic way, I didn’t want to lose your friendship. So when you told me about Matt last week, I lost it. I went to a club, and got drunk and pulled a random guy and … well you know what happened, got myself in trouble… again, but I couldn’t care about that. You didn’t want me, you found yourself another guy and I had to shake five years of pining off. Facing the fact that now I had to make changes in my professional life as well as my private life. I’ve been feeling shit the past days and here you are telling me … you’ve always loved me….I… I’m” that’s where Louis’ frustrated monologue ends because Harry is taking him in his arms and kisses him softly. At first Louis, taken by surprise, pushes him softly away, but changes his mind. He wraps his arms around Harry’s neck and sinks in the kiss, sighing contently. They keep kissing until Harry slowly pulls away.

“That was quite a speech… “He teases Louis as he leans his forehead against Louis’. Louis pokes Harry in his ribs.

“You twat!” he softly smiles. They move to the couch still kissing and smiling. Louis pulls away after a few minutes.

“As much as I like this.... what about Matt?” he looks at Harry, expression serious.

“Ah… well, he’s more perceptive than me. He told me that I loved you… I was stunned when he said that, he had quite a few good arguments to prove it too. He let me go… no hard feelings. “Harry said softly.

“Wow, think I might like him after all.” Louis replies in a soft voice, pulling a curl from Harry’s forehead.

Harry smiles at him “He’s okay, just not a certain hot movie star who makes my head spin and sends butterflies playing in my stomach. “ Louis laughs.

“Really? Hmm… “And he kisses Harry again. 

“Louis, do you wanna talk about it?” Harry asks that night after they’ve cleaned up the kitchen after dinner.

“Not much to tell, really.” Louis shrugs his shoulders. “Like I said, I went out, got drunk, and pulled the guy who turned out to be a complete jerk. He was already gone when I woke up in the hotel room and when I wanted to check my mail, the tweet popped up on my Twitter.” Louis sighs. “So I’m in hiding again. Just have no clue how to go about everything, but it helps that you’re here. “They cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie. Louis’ head resting against Harry’s chest. Harry’s chin resting on top of Louis’ head, his hands curling around Louis’ waist. Absentmindly he strokes over Louis’ chest with his hands, letting them go over the sides of Louis’ pants. Louis looks up and Harry kisses his nose, making Louis smile. Louis turns around, so he’s now facing Harry, a leg on each side of Harry’s legs, so he’s sitting in his lap. He wraps his arms around his neck and places soft lips on Harry’s. This kiss is so different from the way they kissed for the video. It’s sweet and soft. Harry lets Louis take the lead, letting his lips explore Harry’s. Louis’ taking his time as if he wants to savour every inch of Harry’s lips. Harry sighs contently. Louis takes it as a sign to continue exploring. His hands frame Harry’s face, stroking a thumb softly over his jawline. Harry wants this to last forever. Louis’ hands move to his curls, pulling and stroking, and that seems to have an effect on Louis, because the soft kisses turn into more heated and demanding kisses, while his hands continue to pull softly on Harry’s curls. Harry loves the pulls and moans quietly, opening his mouth slightly to give Louis tongue entrance. Louis tastes like the wine they had for dinner, sweet like the Riesinger. Harry feels arousal pooling in the pit of his stomach, but tries to ignore it. The last thing he wants is to scare Louis off. Louis is setting the pace and Harry is aiming to please. Harry kisses him back, exploring Louis’ mouth with his tongue, his hands roaming over Louis’ back, his thumb brushing over bare skin where Louis’ shirt rides up, he slowly lets his hand sneak under his shirt and softly caresses the skin under it. Louis moans into his mouth, moving his hands to Harry’s shirt, pulling it up, then he stops all of a sudden and pulls back a little. Harry looks at him studiously, Louis’ cheeks are flushed, his eyes full of longing and it takes all of Harry’s self-control not to throw himself at Louis.

“Uhm, is this alright ?” Louis asks hesitantly, a bit out of breath.

“More than alright.” Harry assures him and that’s all the courage Louis needs. He pulls Harry’s shirt over his head and bents down to kiss the bird tattoos on Harry’s chest. The hot breath on his skin makes Harry shiver. Louis looks up.

“Alright?”

“Yeah… can I take your shirt off?” Harry says in a low voice. His body is feeling hot, but still he tries to hold back. Louis nods and helps Harry with his shirt. Harry’s hands move up to Louis’ chest, caressing his shoulders and down over his chest to the band of his pants. Louis lets out a moan as he tilts his head backwards. “God, you’re gorgeous, like this.” Harry’s voice sounds husky, his arousal is undeniable, and he knows Louis must feel the hardness of his cock through his pants. Louis looks at him in a way that doesn’t need explaining. He wants Harry just as much as Harry wants him.

“Let’s go upstairs…” Louis’ voice is low. 

Louis leads him to his bedroom and pulls Harry down on the bed, unbuttoning Harry’s jeans, while Harry helps Louis out of his. Harry pulls a tense Louis down, so he’s on top of him. He can feel Louis relax once Harry starts moving his hands over Louis’ body.

“Just tell me what you want...” Harry mumbles in Louis’ ear, his hands never leaving Louis’ body. Louis kisses Harry’s collarbone and moves down a little.

“I want to blow you.” Harry swallows when he sees the look in Louis’ eyes and just nods an approval. Louis shifts a bit backwards, then he slowly removes Harry’s boxers, revealing a flushed, hard cock, already leaking precome. Louis just stares.

Harry’s gets a bit uncomfortable, so he asks “What… what is it?”

“FUCK, you’re big.” Louis whispers still staring at the heavy cock leaking on Harry’s stomach. Harry feels his cheeks reddening.

“I... if it’s too much... you know… a handjob is okay.” he tries. Louis shakes his head and bends down, his hand brushing softly over Harry’s length, before he wraps his hand firmly around it, using his thumb to spread the precome over the head, then he lowers his head and takes Harry in his mouth, licks around the head with his tongue a few times, before he starts sucking properly. Harry gasps. Louis’ mouth feels amazing. His hands are gripping the sheets when Louis takes him down inch by inch, until he’s almost gagging.

“Fuck, you’re amazing!” Harry pants. Louis pulls back all the way to breathe and looks at Harry with a smile before he ducks back and takes Harry in again all the way and starts bobbing up and down faster, bit by bit. Harry’s head starts to spin, his mouth goes dry, and he’s close.

“Louis, Lou… I’m close….” he moans, Louis gives the head a soft lick and that’s it. Harry’s coming and he’s coming hard down Louis’ throat. His entire body shudders from his orgasm, it takes a while before Harry comes down. When he opens his eyes he smiles at Louis and mouths “Wow!” Louis smiles back at him, looking happy and content with himself.

“That was amazing…. by far the best I’ve ever had.” Harry props up on his elbows still smiling at Louis. “Do you want me to return the favour?” he asks. Louis looks at him sheepishly.

“Nah…. I kind of … already.” Harry looks down at Louis’ boxers.

“Oh… I see. Let me get you a flannel. “ Harry offers. When he returns Louis is naked. It’s a sight. He’s tan almost all over, breath-taking. Harry kneels on the bed next to Louis and slowly cleans the remnants of come from Louis’ stomach. Louis is holding his breath while Harry strokes his stomach with the cloth. Harry then throws the cloth aside on the floor and lies down next to Louis, pulling the sheets so they cover both their bodies and sighs. Louis wraps his arm around Harry to hold him close.

“You mind?” he asks, his voice a bit shaky.

“Nope, I love to cuddle.” Harry says and he wraps his arm around Louis’ waist pulls him closer so Louis’ head rests against his chest.

“Please stay.” Louis whispers before he falls asleep. It’s only then that Harry realizes the fear Louis must be feeling after his unfortunate escapade.

“There’s no place I’d rather be. “He whispers back. He hears a sigh, a sigh of relief.

Early the next morning when Harry opens his eyes, he sees two blue eyes staring into his’.

“Hi” he says.

“You stayed...” Louis says, still staring at Harry, in disbelief. Harry moves his body closer to Louis' and kisses his forehead.

“Of course I stayed. I love you, remember?” Louis smiles and leans his head against Harry’s chest while he wraps his arm around Harry’s waist. Harry kisses the top of his head.

“I still can’t believe this is happening.” Louis sighs against his chest.

“Better get used to it, I’m not letting you go… ever.” Harry replies softly caressing Louis’ shoulder. Louis looks up to him

“You mean that?” he asks shyly.

“I do, Louis. Unless you don’t want me to?” Harry frowns a little.

“No, no … I want to be with you… always. It’s just… it’s all new… and so good, I feel like I’m dreaming.” Louis admits.

“I know.” Harry whispers. They lay in silence for a while, enjoying their new found love, their bodies pressed together before dozing off again.

*****

 

They spend the next weeks together in the cottage, doing the things they did before they became an item, except for now they cuddle, kiss and make out a lot too. They went to London together to watch the music video together with Ben and his team, James and Louis’ agent. Although Harry was quite nervous, with Louis by his side he felt much better. They were happy with the final edit of the video and they celebrated by going out to dinner together. Harry announced his new single yesterday morning at BBC's Radio 1 Breakfast show with Nick and now they're in front of the TV waiting for the video to air.

“Only five minutes!” Harry’s hands are sweaty and he’s jumping up from the couch every minute or so.

 “Harry love, come sit next to me and relax. “ Louis tries, but it’s like he’s talking to a wall, because Harry keeps pacing up and down the room. Louis sighs and gives up and then finally: “Here’s what we’ve all been waiting for. Harry Styles’ new single “Where do broken hearts go”, it’s unlike his earlier songs, Harry's turning into a true rock star and the video sure is different too, people!”  Harry sits down next to Louis as the first chords of the song start. Louis strokes his back softly. The text messages are coming in on Harry’s phone.

“I’m proud of you, son” from his mum, “Well done, little brother” from his sister and the texts keep coming. Louis reads them over Harry’s shoulder and they both grin when they read Niall’s text “Wow, little Harry Styles just became a Sex God!”  

“Amazing vid, Styles” from Liam. Harry sighs

“Okay, so far so good. “He says. Louis opens the laptop that’s been sitting on the table.

“Ready for the rest of the world?” he asks raising his eyebrows at Harry. Harry nods. Harry’s twitter account has an overload of messages.

He scrolls through them and suddenly looks at Louis confused “Who’s Larry Stylinson?” Louis shrugs.

 “Let me have a look. “He says. After reading a couple of tweets he suddenly bursts out in laughter. “Looks like your fans want us to be a couple: they’ve mixed our names, it’s called a ship. Well, guess we already beat them!” He winks at Harry. Harry grins too. There are a few nasty tweets too, no surprise there.

“Let’s have a look at your twitter.” Harry says. Louis changes accounts.

“Holy shit… there’s a lot!” He reads through them with Harry by his side, he suddenly freezes at a new tweet; it’s addressed to both of them. From grant_barrow, the guy Louis hooked up with and who’d posted the picture of Louis in bed.

“Fuck...” Louis whispers. Harry wraps his arms around him. “Fake shagging is all he can “is what the tweet says. Harry logs out and opens his twitter account and replies "I disagree".

“Is this okay?” he whispers in Louis’ ear.

“You know you’re gonna out us, right? There’s no going back after you press send. “Louis looks at him in earnest.

“I’m aware of that. This will shut him up and everybody will forget about it, because they’ve got something better to talk about.” Harry cups Louis’ head in his hands. Louis nods.

“Okay… do it.” Harry presses send. They sit for a while watching what’s happening and within seconds Twitter is exploding and # LarryStylinsonisreal is trending at no.1. They log out and shut the laptop.

Harry takes Louis by the hand and leads him upstairs to their bedroom, which once was Louis’ only. He pulls him close, Louis is breathing heavily, lust in his eyes, he wants Harry.  

“I want you so much” Harry’s voice is so low he hardly recognizes it himself. Louis pulls him towards the bed, taking Harry’s shirt off as he moves, Harry helping Louis out of his shirt. They both help each other out of their jeans and boxers, until they’re both naked. Harry pushes Louis softly on the bed and moves himself so he’s on top of him.

“You’re so gorgeous.” he almost moans. Louis pulls Harry’s head down and kisses him, not hiding his desire and Harry catches on fast. It’s just a matter of seconds before their tongues are dancing around each other making wet sounds as their hands explore each other’s bodies. Harry slowly removes his lips from Louis’ and let them slide down the side of Louis’ neck, biting softly in the skin below his ear, his hands move to  Louis’ stomach, his mouth teases his Louis’ nipple, he softly bites. A soft moan is escaping from Louis’ mouth, he continues to move his lips softly over his stomach to his belly button, blowing soft puffs of air that make Louis shiver. His lips follow the trail of soft hairs below to stop at the heavily leaking cock, Harry’s teasing the head with small kitten licks, making Louis groan and his hips buck up.

“Please, don’t tease.” Harry smiles at Louis’ impatience. Harry opens the drawer and takes out a small bottle of lube and a condom. Harry looks at Louis for approval. They had full sex before, Louis being on top of him, but not the other way around. Louis had been uncomfortable with that after his hook-up.

“You don’t have to, you know that, whatever you want, love.” Harry says as he takes Louis’ hand in his.

“I want to… “Louis’ says, his voice sounding confident and lustful. Harry kisses Louis’ hand and then slicks up his fingers with lube. He carefully pushes a finger in, moving it in and out slowly before adding another, all the time looking at his lover. He’s beautiful like this, his head slightly tilted back, his mouth open a bit as Harry opens him up. Harry adds another finger and moves them, until he hits Louis’ spot. A loud moan escapes from Louis’ throat, his body is sweating.

“You alright?” Harry asks softly.

“Yes … come on, I want you in me.” Louis’ strangled voice is enough for Harry to make the move. He opens the package with his teeth, rolls the condom on and slicks his cock with lube. He moves his hips and slowly enters. Louis tenses a bit. Harry waits until he relaxes before entering a bit further. “You can move now.” Louis’ voice is shaking a bit. Harry pushes a bit further in and out, slowly picking up the speed. He can feel Louis adjusting to the rhythm, his cock leaking on his stomach, his back arching a bit off the bed with every thrust. Harry’s hair is sticking in his neck, he feels his body heating up. He’s breathing heavily, he won’t last much longer. He wraps a hand around Louis’ cock and starts pumping him. Louis’ body is covered in sweat, his chest flushing red as his breathes are coming in hitches. Harry thrusts in again and Louis lets out a scream as he arches his back off the bed, streaks of come covering his stomach and that’s when Harry collapses on top of him, panting. It takes a while before they come down from their orgasms. Louis stroking Harry’s long locks. “That was fantastic.” Louis says, still a bit out of breath.

“For me too …” Harry pants. “Geez, I’m totally knocked out.” he sighs heavily. He can feel Louis chuckling.

“Old man” Louis teases him.

“I’m too tired to argue, so you’re getting away with it tonight. “ Harry groans. He slowly gets up and kisses Louis on the nose. “Gonna clean you up.” He walks to the bathroom, his legs are still wobbly. He comes back with a warm wet cloth and cleans Louis stomach. He pulls the sheets over the two of them and orders “Sleep!” as he nuzzles his nose in Louis neck.

“Sleep” Louis agrees.

 

******

 

The press and gossip pages have the times of their lives writing about the new hottest couple in the entertainment business. Both James and Louis’ agent write out a press release confirming Louis and Harry are in a romantic relationship. Harry’s single is currently no.1 in the charts and they’re celebrating at the cottage with Liam, Niall, Zayn and Perry.

“Can’t believe we produced a no.1 hit we actually like!” Liam says, Niall laughs.

“We produce some shit sometimes.” he agrees. Zayn and Louis had quite some catching up to do, so Perrie offered to help Harry in the kitchen to get some snacks and more wine.

“Are you happy?” she asks him. Harry beams.

“Never been happier.” he confides in her. “He’s the true love of my life.” Perrie hugs him.

“I’m so happy for the two of you. I’ve never seen Louis like this before. It’s like he’s thrown the weight of the world from his shoulders. He adores you.”

“Thanks.” Harry hugs her back. Niall comes into the kitchen.

“Need help? Louis wants us all in the room, says he’s got an important announcement to make.” They carry the snacks and bottles to the room. Louis seems a bit nervous. Harry pats his knee.

“Relax love, it’s just us.” Louis smiles fondly at him.

“Okay, well… uhm. I’ve got a bit of news for everyone. I only got the phone call just before you guys arrived, so Harry doesn’t know either.” He pauses and then continues. “I got a call from my agent confirming I’ve got one of the leading parts in a new BBC crime-series.” Harry is the first to congratulate him and soon Louis is wrapped in his friends’ arms. They’re all so happy for him.

“That means you stay in England then?” Louis smiles.

“Yes, the filming is actually mostly in the Cotswolds and on set just outside London. So I’ll be staying here.”

“What about you, Harry?”  Zayn wants to know.

“I’m doing a tour in the UK in smaller venues next year, no world tours anymore for a while. Some festivals in the UK and Europe and I’m going to write for other artists. So I’ll be staying here too.”

  
When their friends leave, Niall and Liam are staying with Zayn and Perrie, they lie on the couch, legs tangled, arms wrapped around each other watching the fire slowly go out.

“Are you happy?” Harry asks while he’s playing with Louis’ hair.

“Beside you, my popstar…..I’m a very happy man.” Louis answers as he looks up in Harry’s green eyes.

 

THE END

 


End file.
